It's almost Tax Day! Ehrmagerd, taxshez. Have you done yours yet? I hear that tax clock ticking away. But hey, you still have a few hours before Monday, so why not procrastinate a little more with a few tax-related factoids, jokes, and stories? Gather 'round the paperwork bonfire and enjoy a few laughs and head-scratchers. BEFORE YOUR DAY OF TAX RECKONING! Mwa ha ha.
1. Follow the Money: First of all, where does all the tax money go? No seriously, guess which ONE program a full quarter of every tax dollar goes to. Do you know? Guess, and then check to see if you're correct.
2. Tax Game: Oooh, brain hurts. That's heavy. Let's go for something lighter and pretend taxes are just a game. Play the Tax Evaders video game. It's fun for Americans of all tax brackets. (Get it? Tax Evaders, Space Invaders... oh never mind.)
3. Who here likes taxes? Did you know that a third of Americans LIKE taxes? Yes, like. I'm one of them. This year I filed as head of the household, used my child exemption, and got a mortgage abatement and CHA-CHING! Thanks for the refund. It's the one time of the year when being a single mom is a bonus.
4. Taxes are a mystery: No really. People have written mystery novels about taxes. There's the 1941 classic, Death and Taxes by David Dodge (DODGE, lololol). And there's A Little Rebellion: April 15 Surprise, in which a certified accountant tries to take on the IRS, gets tangled up with a Russian mole, and endangers the women he loves. Of course.
5. Tax swag: Got a refund coming? Good for you! You could plan a vacation, or do a home improvement project. Or you could just buy some of these income tax t-shirts: "I'm having an out-of-money experience!" "The IRS: We're Not Happy Until You're Unhappy!" I hear these are popular at family reunions.
6. How to do your taxes: Here's Stephen Colbert schooling Jon Stewart on how to fill out those troublesome forms.
7. Can I write off my Luna Bars? And finally, here's SNL's Drunk Uncle and his friend Peter "Drunklage" on tax season.
Have you done your taxes yet, or still working on them?
Image via SNL