What the WHAT?! This story is just too bizarre for words. Okay, maybe it's not that bizarre. We're all accustomed to stories of pervy male adults raping and molesting young girls. But when we hear about a woman reportedly doing it -- it just boggles the mind. Yes, I know they do it. But still. You just don't expect it. Reportedly, a 42-year-old ex-NFL cheerleader named Elizabeth Garner was arrested after following a 12-year-old boy to the bathroom in the house where she was attending a party hosted by the boy's mother -- and some nasty stuff went down. So to speak. Listen.

Reportedly the woman, who cheered for the Tennessee Titans up until three years ago, followed the 12-year-old kid to the bathroom, grabbed his penis, and tried to perform oral sex on him. She also allegedly asked him if he'd ever been with a woman. Ewwww. Nooooo. So wrong.

The boy managed to escape her clutches and reported the incident to his mother, who called the police. Can you imagine being the mom at that party? It's amazing she didn't kill the woman. It must have taken every ounce of strength she had not to. Perhaps the boy waited until the woman left to reveal what happened.

Garner, however, denies the charges. She reportedly admitted she was drunk at the party and had confused the boy with another male adult in the house. Wow. That must be one very large kid. And even if you buy that explanation, it's still kind of gross when you consider that Garner is married.

I think there's a misconception that any 12-year-old boy would be thrilled if an older woman, a former cheerleader no less, tried to get busy with him. But this stereotype does a huge disservice to the emotional devastation wrought by sexual abuse -- which is equal for boys and girls.

Perhaps Garner was living in her own twisted fantasy version of American Pie. Perhaps she's just really, really messed up. I doubt her "I was too drunk to tell how old he is" defense will fly, but we shall see.

Do you think she could have mistaken the boy for an adult?

 

Image via Murfreesboro Police