Grieving Mother Cruelly Harassed After Miscarriage

Horrifying 185

bassinetAs if a miscarriage isn't painful enough -- one mother's suffering multiplied when she wanted to have her lost fetus treated with respect. Shayna Spitzack was seven and a half weeks pregnant when she miscarried. Often, in a miscarriage this early in a pregnancy, the tiny fetus is lost in the flow of blood and tissue and ends up accidentally getting flushed down the toilet. But Shayna managed to save hers and wanted to have it cremated. She wrapped it carefully and put it in a box.

Then she called a funeral home (whose director just happened to be married to her midwife). The director wanted to make sure he was following the law correctly, so he called the county coroner, Jeff Baldi. And that's when a sad, private loss turned into a CSI episode.

Apparently the coroner didn't trust Shayna's story. Maybe he's just insensitive, maybe he's watched too much crime TV, but the wheels got turning in his mind and took him to Crazyland. Instead of calling Shayna's obstetrician, who easily could have confirmed the miscarriage, he called the freakin' police.

Next thing Shayna knows, there's a loud pounding on the door. Shayna was expecting the coronor. But it was the police, looking for an aborted or murdered baby hidden in the freezer. Shayna tried to show them the box with the fetus but the waved her off and searched her freezer for the dead baby that wasn't there. The police say the call from the coroner's office made them think this was a possible case of murder. They thought they would find a third-trimester baby.

It all got sorted out eventually. But what the hell! Why did the coroner have to assume the worst when the funeral director called him about treating a dead fetus? What kind of misogynist mindset goes there immediately? It's like he was sitting around waiting to catch some wicked harlot in the act of a late-term abortion! Get a grip, man. That poor woman. First she suffers the pain of her miscarriage, and then she's treated with such suspicion and disrespect. Can we please trust women a little more than this?

Why do you think the coroner was so suspicious after the funeral director's call?

 

Image via I Should Be Folding Laundry/Flickr

death, in the news, women's issues, miscarriage & loss

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Jennifer Cummings

she was 7 1/2 WEEKS pregnant.... and this all crazy that man should be ashamed of himself. i myself have had a miscarriage at 9 weeks... if the physical and emotional pain isn't enough.. this man went way too far. some people..

Melanie Lee Booker

@billsfan it clearly states at the beginning of the artical that the woman was 7 1/2 WEEK no months, so call it a fetus is correct.

davis... davismom03

Read ppl it says weeks

nonmember avatar treva

It doesnt matter if it is seven n half weeks or seven n half months!!...when a mother loses a child, they have a right to grieve however they want!!i am seven weeks pregnant and i would be devastated if i lost the baby!!!...shame on the ppl telling this mother how to grieve!!

talie09 talie09

Billsfan1104 I don't see where she put months.... She clearly said 7 and a half weeks....... Anyways poor woman she shouldn't have been treated that way if it would of been some murder case I'm sure she wouldn't have called the funeral home....

nonmember avatar proudmommy3

Damn people do make mistakes. You people sure are quick to judge someone. Who cares if she wanted her baby cremated. Everyone has their own way of grieving. Quit being a bunch of judgemental bitches and get over it.

Jessica Calvillo

If you read ALL of the comments the author originally said months then corrected it. So NOW it says weeks.

I think that there was a misunderstanding. He either thought she had been 7.5 months pregnant and that baby died or he thought she had a 7.5 week old newborn. I would never have though of cremating such a tiny baby. Not that I disagree with it... but possibly the coroner also never heard of that and thought she meant something else.

kkat117 kkat117

While i agree that this is an awful thing to happen, I agree with other users...the coroner couldnt contact the obgyn duw to privacy laws. If her doctor knew how she wanted to treat her child they should have discussed with her how to go about having him/her buried. There must be a way to go about doing it that would not have resulted in police involvement. The coroner should have paid attention to the age of the child in question....the police

Melissa Pagano Leech

why is most people who comment on these articles crazy? If you dont like what the medical term for the stage of development then talk to a doctor... geez. NOT TO MENTION it is not even a fetus at the point it is an embryo. They are called different names to signify the stage of development. NOT TO MENTION a kitten does have a fetus inside of them... some people are crazy pants...Just to cut you off before you complain crazy pants is not a medical term...

kkat117 kkat117

Should have listened to the mother and the mothers doctor should have discussed this with her

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