Squirrels have had it up to here with those bird feeders in our yards that won't let them get some food, and they've started to exact their revenge. One such squirrel in London let the world know that they're out for blood when he attacked a member of One Direction, the beloved UK boy band. Poor Niall Horan was physically assaulted by the bloodthirsty rodent -- it latched on and didn't let go. In Niall's attempt to escape its tiny yet relentless grasp, the dude tore a few ligaments in his knee. Yes, this really happened.
This is the squirrels' highest profile assault to date, but they've been mounting an ambush for a while now. You won't believe how many other cases there've been of squirrels attacking humans.
Back in May 2011, an angry squirrel attacked at least three people in Bennington, Vermont. It attached to its victims and wouldn't let go. This particular squirrel used to be somebody's pet, but when he was let loose, well, all hell broke loose, too.
In 2009, workers at a UK hospital were encouraged to, get this, walk in pairs, wear safety helmets, and carry an umbrella as a weapon because one squirrel had an insatiable taste for human blood.
And then, in Orlando a few years ago, a 3-year-old boy was attacked on the playground. The squirrel wouldn't release the poor kid even after people started hurling things at it. Eventually, the rodent relented, and the boy was treated for injuries at the local hospital.
Plus, who could forget back in February when purple squirrels came onto our radar. I mean, if that's not their version of war paint, I don't know what is.
And just this weekend, as I was waiting for my sister outside of her Brooklyn apartment, I saw a squirrel fall from a tree and land on the head of an innocent young woman who was walking on the sidewalk, talking on her phone. It was horrifying. Thankfully, the beast sort of bounced off her head and then sprinted into the bushes ... no harm, no foul. At the time I thought it was an accident on the squirrel's part, but now? I'm not so sure.
Between my account and Niall's, it's pretty obvious that the squirrel retaliation force is here, and it's serious. Be careful out there, everybody. God speed.
Squirrels ever bother you?