al goreFormer Vice President and current green-living crusader Al Gore popped out of his all-natural hyperbolic chamber last night to inform everyone that he knows why President Obama did so poorly in the debate Wednesday evening. After watching Obama and Romney go at it on a television that was powered by a pedal machine hooked up to Keith Olbermann, Al had a CFL light-bulb moment and went on Current TV, his own channel, and explained that Obama wasn't on his A-game because, well, because of the altitude, everybody.

Al explains that Obama arrived in Denver only a few hours before the debate and implied that when you go up 5,000 feet, you lose all ability to make complete, coherent sentences, and you become distracted by great heads of hair. Here's what Al said:

I’m going to say something controversial here. Obama arrived in Denver at 2 p.m. today -- just a few hours before the debate started. Romney did his debate prep in Denver. When you go to 5,000 feet, and you only have a few hours to adjust -- I don’t know ...

But honestly, why stop there. If Al wants to blame the altitude for Obama's performance, why not throw in global warming while we're at it?

Maybe Obama was too hot. Maybe his throat was too dry. Maybe he had a nose bleed. Or maybe a polar bear jumped off a melting iceberg in the Arctic, which caused a splash, which caused a wave, which crashed on the shore of Texas, which caused an oil-covered seal to wail, which caused a sound frequency, which caused an interference of radio signals, which made a technician in the control booth of Denver's NBC affiliate slam his fist on the table, which caused a vibration that Obama felt in his shoes and distracted him all, night, long.

If only Al Gore was around, blaming things on the altitude when I had to travel to Denver a few times for work. Would've loved to accuse a wonky presentation on the elevation. Sorry, boss! Al says I mixed up the net and gross figures cuz weez in da mountains.

If only.

What do you think of Al Gore's remark?

 

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