Like Yeardley Love three years ago, a beautiful, promising college student has been found dead in her dorm room, the victim of an apparent attack (allegedly) by her boyfriend. Alexandra Kogut was a freshman at the College of Brockport in New York. Her worried mother contacted campus police after she couldn't find her and they found her dead in her dorm, beaten and bruised.
It's a horrific story no matter who the victim is, but when she is a young college student, so lovely and full of promise, it's especially upsetting. The man who allegedly confessed to her murder, Clayton Whittemore, 21, was also a college student at Utica and was visiting his girlfriend at her school.
He was a star athlete. She was a beautiful, younger girl. It seems like the perfect high school/college match, right? Wrong. Obviously.
This is the classic wolf in sheep’s clothing story and it's also one we see again and again. This entitled golden boy who thinks he can do no wrong (like George Huguely) who has succeeded in everything except, perhaps, this love. He just goes crazy. Now, Whittemore hasn't been convicted, but if he did this crime, then he and Huguely are both important lessons for women: don’t judge a book by its pretty cover.
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Most of us older women might (hopefully) know this by now. But teens still need to learn it. It doesn't matter how many trophies the guy has or how romantic he seems, if you have any questions at all, you speak up. The only clue Kogut left was a cryptic Twitter message: “Should've known.” We may never know what she meant by that.
We do know this: A promising young woman is dead before she even had the chance to spread her wings. Again. Enough is enough. Dating violence is just as real as domestic violence and it's hurting people younger and younger. My heart just breaks for her frantic mother. I can only imagine what she feels.
Do stories like these make you worry about our daughters a little bit more?
Image via Thell/Flickr