Voter, there's some important news from the campaign trail you need to hear. Now. Mitt Romney's running mate Paul Ryan may not be the man you think he is. In fact, it's looking increasingly likely that the man running for vice president is a small wooden boy whose father's name is Geppetto (no word yet on whether his conscience goes by the name Jiminy).
I know, it sounds so unlikely! But then, so do the host of lies the Wisconsin Congressman has been caught in lately. You've probably heard how he faked his marathon time? Now there's another whopper that's been uncovered.
The folks at Slate pored over the fitness-crazed Congressman's claims that working out with the P90X and (prepare as I'm about to blaspheme) skipping cake on his birthday has helped him trim down to just 6 to 8 percent body fat. But according to the experts they contacted, that kind of skinny only exists in elite runners. And as we've already determined by his not as awesome as he'd like us to think marathon time, Ryan is NOT an elite runner. He's not even a top college swimmer, who are fatties by comparison to the runners with a typical 9.8 percent body fat ratio.
So what does all this mean? Is Ryan a bad candidate because he doesn't have the same body as Usain Bolt? Of course not. Voters shouldn't be that shallow. But then ... neither should Paul Ryan.
Paul Ryan is a bad candidate because he subscribes to the Pinocchio school of telling the truth. He's been caught lying about the most banal things, at times when he wasn't even on a hot seat. We'd be foolish as voters if we didn't wonder what else he's lied about and where he might be casual with the truth in the future. Once a liar, always a liar.
This is a man who wants to assume the second-highest office in the country, to be a heartbeat away from the presidency as they say. I don't think it's too much to want to be able to trust the man who's in that seat.
Do you trust Paul Ryan? Will you vote for him?
Image via monkeyz_uncle/Flickr