11-Year-Old Boy May Have Abused Disabled Mom But He's a Victim Too

Heartbreaking 62

electrical cordYou hear sad cases of child abuse in the news all the time. But in a bizarre and sad twist on the standard abuse case, an 11-year-old boy has been arrested this week and charged with beating his own disabled mom to the point where she had to be hospitalized.

It sounds like this poor woman, who has battled breast and skin cancers, just can't catch a break. And yet, I can't help feeling badly for her little boy. He might be responsible for beating his mom with an electric cord, but from the sound of it, he's just a little kid who has been failed by the system for far too long.

According to the cops who took the 11-year-old into custody and charged him with elder abuse and assault with a deadly weapon, the boy hasn't had a normal childhood. He lives alone with his 51-year-old mother who never leaves the house, and he is her primary caregiver. This 11-year-old cooks. He cleans. He does laundry.

Would it really be a surprise if this kid snapped?

We already known that people who are providing the primary care for a sick loved one are at a higher risk of depression, often see their own health decline, and are often unable to handle the mounting stress. Now try putting all that on the shoulders of a little boy, a kid whose own body is dealing with the changes that come with hitting the tween years. He's likely struggling with anger over the loss of his childhood, coupled with the feelings of helplessness that kids naturally feel when they're trying to buck their parents' rules as they grow up.

He should have been getting help all along. Unfortunately, it's taken an extreme situation -- his arrest, his mom's hospitalization -- to finally get what he so desperately needed: attention from the authorities.

Kids being forced to provide care for ailing parents is an under-reported but serious problem in this country. According to one study of high school drop-outs, as much as 22 percent were leaving school because they had to help care for a family member.

It's a situation that needs to be addressed, to be fixed, to give kids their childhoods back, and to prevent situations like this.

I don't excuse a boy allegedly beating his mom with an electrical cord. But I can't help thinking he's been punished enough. What he needs now is help.

What do you think should be done with this boy now?

 

Image via Public Domain Photos/Flickr

crime, human rights

62 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

nonmember avatar teri

Both need counseling. People who struggle with mental illness can not always see their responsibility to their family members. It said she never left their residence and that is common for those who suffer from deep depression. I saw nothing about a father or family members. Many times family members will abandon the mentally ill . I think the son needs counseling not jail and some place to be just a kid. Sometimes having to growup fast is not a good thing. I hope this child gets a chance to have a family that can give him guidance he despartly needs not how to be a criminal.

momma... mommagirl77

I'm an ADULT caregiver and I CANNOT imagine a child being put in a situation of such magnitude!!! There are days I am ready to crack...break...throw in the towel.



I hope authorities find it in their hearts to take the stress level of this CHILD into sight and get the family what they need!!! HELP!

Melissa Morrison

This story is so sad. I am also one of those who'd like to know where this womans' family is; do these people not know about her health issues, do they not know her son has been taking care of her and himself for all of this time, or does their family just not care? Someone needed to haev noticed some type of signs that this boys parents weren't involved at school, with his education, or that he wasn't like all the other children his age. So, I'd like to know why no one stepped up or stepped in on behalf of this young man before now? Please don't send him to juvenile dention, get him the mental and physical help he so desperately needs.

sarah... sarahlynch

What a terrible event. I hope the boy gets help and the family or social workers help the both of them. I am so shocked he has been incharge of caring for his mom with her around doctors and nurses who were envoled with her case

sarah... sarahlynch

What a terrible event. I hope the boy gets help and the family or social workers help the both of them. I am so shocked he has been incharge of caring for his mom with her around doctors and nurses who were envoled with her case

Venae Venae

So will the hospital once again release her when there is no one else home but a child?  It's fine if you are able to care for that child, but she obviously isn't.  If no one is there to help them, mom might be headed for a nursing home and the child into foster care.  


Where the hell is the rest of the family?

jessi... jessicad2

i agree that some relief for the little oe with counseling, also medical and counseling help. I'm sure she has allot of shame and guilt for he pressure that her boy kissing momSon had, i do that it is a relief for both of them and maybe some joint counseling, i'm sure they have a strong bond and great love from there struggles. I pray for them:)


 

nonmember avatar Shanna

If he were a teenager no one would say he didn't deserve to be punished. He committed a crime. If his mother beat him you would all be screaming for her blood. Yes, I think it was a bad situation for a child to be in, but he still put his own mother in the hospital. He needs to own up to his crime, saying it's okay to commit a crime just because he's a child is setting a horrid example because he will continue to do wrong knowing he has gotten away with a crime before. Yes, he needs to get mental help but he also needs to punished. What if he had beaten a baby to death? Would you still be saying that he didn't need to be punished?

nonmember avatar chrissy

This child needs help, not to be arrested, this is from my area, this little boy is usually very polite, very tiny for his age and trying to manage responsibilities that would be very difficult for even most of us adults, he has been handed over to his father and the district attorney is looking into what charges if any will be charged based on the unusuall circunstances in this case, this mother could have qualified for in home services allowing her child to live a more normal life, there has got to be more to this story that will surface as to why she only allowed the boy to care for her instesd of getting help, why the dad wasn't in the home, she was probably to much for him also, and if so, why did he leave his son their...time will answere these and many more questions, but more likely the boy will stay with his dad and receive the help he needs to heal from this, i would pretty much guess based on our juvenille system here if he does have any charges that stick he will likely get probabtion, i doubt they will send this very tiny boy to jail for cracking under pressure of a responsibility he should have never had!!

nonmember avatar tracy nuckolls

i'd love to know what the mom did to deserve being beaten by a cord. another is where else would he be put beisdes juvi? a foster home or orphange. most cases thats worse than the crap hes dealing with at home.

41-50 of 62 comments First 34567 Last