The massacre in Aurora, Colorado at the midnight premiere of Dark Knight Rises last Friday may go down in history as one of the nation's most painful collective memories. But for the family of James Holmes, the alleged perpetrator of this horrific, senseless attack, it will be something else. It will be the day the world started to see them as villains.
The family has understandably been silent on the accusations against their son, but they did speak out through a lawyer on Monday saying only that they stand by their son. There was more, too.
Lawyer and family spokeswoman Lisa Damiani told reporters at the press conference that the family is keeping it together "as well as anyone could under the circumstances." See below:
Damiani also said:
I think everyone can imagine how they're feeling ... Anyone who's ever been a parent.
But can we, really? My children are very young (both under 6) and likely won't commit any crimes for years (or ever, I hope), but it's hard to imagine wanting to support someone (anyone!) accused of such a crime whether he was my child or not.
Does this make me an awful mom?
It's an awful crime, both tragic and senseless, and Holmes' mother has every right to support her child. But she is in an awful position. His entire family is in a terrible position.
For 24 years they have supported and loved Holmes. They have watched him thrive in school, earning degrees and excelling in academics. They have probably held him while he was sick and sat at his graduation ceremonies, first high school, then college.
No one in their right mind expects that the child they raised might one day commit such a horrific act. I am sure they are asking themselves what they might have done wrong to raise a child who could allegedly do something like this.
The answer: maybe it's nothing they did. It's a terrifying truth, but the truth nonetheless. Sometimes people have mental illness and a sickness inside them that even the best parents in the world can't combat.
I am not saying they are without fault. We don't know enough about his upbringing to say either way. But I do feel for them. We all want to believe the best about our children and, failing that, we want to love them and help them through their mistakes. Even when their mistakes are epic in scale.
My heart breaks for every victim of this tragedy. But there is no doubt that Holmes' family members are victims, too. He hurt them terribly with his alleged crimes and it's all far from over.
Could you stand by your son if he was accused of something like this?
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Comments 25
If my child did something like this I would still love them and correspond with them, because I believe that anyone who commits a crime like this would have to have a mental illness of some sort. But, I would let them know they need to pay for their crime and I would not try under any circumstances to take part in their defense. I would love them through it. There are certain crimes however that I would disown them for. Period.
I agree with billsfan. My child would have to face the consequences, would have to face our justice system. But I would never disown him. I wouldn't support what he did, but would be there.
Yes I would stand by my child if one ever did something like this. I would guide them to do the right thing. I wouldn't lie for them, or try to get them free... because i know they would deserve what the law sees fit. But I wouldn't stop loving them... and I would do my best to show them that too.
I'm with billsfan. I'd love and support but would want to see justice done.
Standing by your child does not mean condoning their actions.
My brother was killed by a hit-and-run driver. We just went to the sentencing a week ago.... The guy spoke before the judge and never once said he was sorry for what he did...he just spoke of how he keeps losing jobs because him employers found out what he did.... His parents were there with him.... they cried when I gave mystatement so I know that they feel for me but they were still there for their son. I do not hold it against them for his actions or for being there for him...
I would stand by my children but let them know that I am not proud nor do I condone their actions. But I would never ever disown them...
Standing by their son does not mean they condone what he's done... just, he is their son. They will try to help him and continue to love him- though he's done a terrible thing.