Jerry Sandusky's Wife's Testimony Is a Heartbreaking Glimpse of Their Life

Dottie SanduskyDottie Sandusky, the wife of disgraced Penn State Assistant Football Coach Jerry Sandusky, is finally telling her side of the story as she testified yesterday in her husband's trial. For months, we have all speculated about what she knew and now we know. She claims to have not seen any evidence of abuse. True or not, my heart breaks for her.

The fact is, Jerry Sandusky stands accused of doing some of the most horrific things to young boys that some of us can even imagine. But his wife is not accused of anything. She was with this man for 45 years, raised six children with him, and supported his career. And whether it's because she is in massive denial or whether it's because she is telling the truth, I do believe she believes what she says.

His face on my television and computer makes me want to throw up, but poor Dottie Sandusky has to feel that times infinity as she was married to him.

Denial can be very powerful for some. There are those who use it in mild ways -- they pretend their marriages are good when they are really awful, they tell themselves they are happy when their lives are a mess, and they claim to love their jobs when you know they don't. But Dottie Sandusky takes that to a whole different level.

Could she have known and stayed with him? My gut says no. I am not basing it on anything scientific but I have to believe that any normal, functioning human being would leave a man she knew was committing these acts.

More from The Stir: Jerry Sandusky Defense Claims 'Everybody' Showered With Kids

My guess is she used a powerful psychological tool to push all those feelings way, way down. One of Sandusky's accusers said she walked in while Sandusky was forcing him to perform oral sex.

Dottie's side of the story was that the two were arguing about tickets to a dinner they had paid $50 for (the child did not want to attend) and she heard Sandusky say: "We did this for you, and you've got to do this for us." Was her mind playing tricks? Did she force herself not to listen to the true meaning behind that line because it was too awful?

We may never know the truth of what she knew, but I say the mind of a powerful thing and if someone does not want to know something, it can protect us. Dottie Sandusky may be messed up, she may have enabled him in her own awful way, but I don't think she knew on a conscious level and the poor woman's world has crumbled. My heart does go out to her. She is a victim, too.

Do you think his wife knew what was happening?


Imag via Getty

child abuse, crime


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

nonmember avatar Em

What if it was your child being molested and forced to perform oral sex on a man who's wife walked in on it but ignored it because she was in "denial". Her actions allow your child to continue to be molested and raped. Would you feel "heartbroken" for her and co sider her a victim as well??

nonmember avatar D

Denial or not. If she had ANY suspicion that these things were happening and didn't do anything about it then she's just as horrifying as her husband. Maybe she could have prevented this from happening to as many children as it did. It's a different story if she really had no idea but denial is a very poor excuse.

jalaz77 jalaz77

No she was not in denial. Especially if she caught them in an act.

Sinat... SinatrasKitten

She came off as a cold hearted bitch, accusing these victims of lying and making theirs stories up. I highly doubt she is in denial.

yanel... yanellitasmom

She's not a victim by ANY means, she's just as much of a fkn a**hole as he is for letting this shit happen. I am with the rest, if this was your baby would you feel sorry for the bitch?? My guess is abso-fucken-lutely not.

Kritika Kritika

I agree with other posters, she wasn't in "denial" about her husband being unfaithful with other adults there were CHILDREN involved. No excuses. She should be ashamed of herself.

tinyp... tinypossum

You've got to be kidding me. We are supposed to feel sorry for a woman who enabled a child molester to rape little boys for 45 years??? I don't give a flying fuck if she is in denial. That only serves to enable her to live with herself. It doesn't absolve her of her complicity in his perversions and crimes. I absolutely believe she knew exactly what he was doing and turned a blind eye to it. She is as responsible as he is. 

nonmember avatar T

I have zero compassion for his wife. She failed those kids and, by extension, failed to be a decent human being. Imagine a child in the act of being abused, another adult catches them and does nothing. Nothing. It's disgraceful and she should be ashamed of herself.

nonmember avatar Violet

I actually know a family that the grandpa molested his own children and grandchildren. His wife stated with him. It strained the rest of the family for just a little while then everybody acted normal having him over for social stuff. It was appalling and disturbing the level of denial that went on. Thank god he passed away. I think denial is a powerful thing, it's terrible but it happens

1-10 of 104 comments 12345 Last