lego witch burningIf the recent communist accusations made by Allen West are any indication, I'm afraid we might be on some crazy time machine with the switch stuck on "backwards." Politicians have been regressing big-time lately, their campaigns becoming -- unapologetically -- more racist and sexist by the week. Racism, sexism ... and now, blacklisting? Sadly, yes: At a town hall meeting on Tuesday, Rep. Allen West (R-Fla.) warned constituents that as many as 80 House Democrats are members of the Communist Party. Or so he's "heard."

Gasp! Those commie bastards!

Good lord, another Red Scare?! Are you kidding me? At the rate we're rewinding through time here, I think it's pretty obvious what's next: A national witch hunt. And I don't mean that metaphorically ...

No, I wouldn't be at all surprised if those stakes were up and primed for burning before we even know it. The only difference between 1692 and 2012 is going to be the way so-called witches are identified. Back then, characteristics of a witch included the ability to float, the inability to perfectly recite The Lord's Prayer, and moles or other dark marks on the body.

Ladies, if you can check one or more of the following off this list -- now might be the time to invest in flame-retardent clothing:

Characteristics of a Witch (2012)

1. Carries birth control pills in purse

2. Works outside the home

3. Divorced

4. Lesbian

5. Hasn't read the Bible

6. Watches the Teletubbies

7. Doesn't have children

8. Has children but not a husband

9. Can accurately state historical facts

10. Refuses a trans-vaginal ultrasound

Yeah ... I'm toast. How about you?

Do you think politicians are regressing in a scary way?

 

Image via Matija Grguric/Flickr