It's Friday, friends. It's almost time to call it quits and start our deserved weekend. Me? Oh, no big plans. Maybe heading to my local Verizon store. Seems like amusing things are happening there. Why? Oh. Sorry. You didn't hear? OK. So a guy in a gorilla suit was outside a wireless store in Ohio doing some promotional sign twirling and the such when, out of nowhere, a guy in a banana suit comes barrelling out of the woods and attacks the gorilla! I know, right?
The wireless store manager, who totally has a career as a D list celeb coming up (you'll see what I mean when you watch the video), called the cops and was all, "Dude! Things are going ape-shit over here! Bananas are attacking my gorilla!"
The protective manager seems like a member of the old Punk'd MTV crew or something; he has got a boyish, Hollywood charm about him that can't be denied.
Manager Brandon describes the banana flying through the air toward his victim like "a Spartan from 300." OK, easy Brando. You're talking to the local news in Strongsville, Ohio, this isn't your audition tape. But I appreciate your enthusiasm, articulation, and white teeth.
Anyway, so Brandon called 911 after his poor mascot was attacked. The banana, it turns out, is still on the loose. It went slithering down the street never to be seen again. Keep your eyes peeled. (Ha.)
This story is just your classic tale of fruit getting revenge on animal. Happens every now and again ... I'll eat a peach with a maggot in it (you win, Peach!) or someone will choke a bit on a grape (damn you, Grapes!) or someone will dress up as a banana and jump a guy dressed as a gorilla. It's foodie justice at its best.
Needless to say this story is pretty freaking ridiculously awesome. The clip is less than a minute and a half, so do yourself a favor and watch it right before you sign off for the day. It will get you in a great mood to start the weekend. Trust. It's Good-All, good. (Ugh. See what I tried to do there?) Just watch, for peels. For reals! Don't be a 'panzee -- watch it. OK, I'm done.
WATCH: Man in a gorilla suit attacked by a banana.