I think it's normal for my parents to want a grandchild. A hint every now and then from my mom about how she'd like to have a baby in the family again has been standard operating procedure since I've hit the later 20s. What's not normal, however, is how badly Marissa Evans wants a grand-baby. She went a little too far. She harvested her dead son's sperm.
Marissa was devastated in 2009 when her 21-year-old son Nikolas sustained a life-threatening brain injury during a fight outside an Austin, Texas bar. He was on life-support for five days before Marissa, 44, had to make the terrifying decision to pull the plug. But before she did so, she was allowed to collect some of Nikolas' sperm. And so the weird science continues.
Marissa just wanted to fulfill her dream of becoming a grandmother, she says, and also claims she's making Nikolas' dream come true, too -- he's always wanted to be a dad. Marissa told The Sun: "The weekend before he died we were talking about what a great dad he would be. And we were saying I'd be a good grandma too. Then just a week later all that suddenly changed."
It changed when the judge ruled it was OK for doctors to take some of Nikolas' sperm so Marissa could impregnate a surrogate with her grandchild. She found a woman willing to be a part of this science fiction story at a Mexican clinic -- she's paying $29,000 for several attempts at pregnancy. Marissa has hand-picked the egg donor.
To me, this is wrong. I understand Marissa is in grief, but I don't think that making a baby that won't know its father or mother and will be raised only by its grandmother (Marissa is divorced and her ex-husband is against this) is a good idea. I would only think this is OK if Nikolas had signed a legal document saying he was cool with his mom taking his sperm and implanting it in a stranger. Other than that, I think this is close to grave robbing. Would we think it was acceptable if Marissa went into Nikolas' house and stole his TV? She's taking his gift of life and she's manipulating it for her benefit.
I think, like the ex-husband, that she's blinded by grief and trying to replace her son. I just hope someone stops her, and helps her heal, before it's too late. So far, there's been no report that her grandchild has been born or conceived.
Do you think a mother should be able to harvest her dead son's sperm, or no?
Photo via arriba/Flickr