End of the World May 21st: What Will Happen to Your Pet on Doomsday?

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dogMay 21, aka the end of the world, is a mere three days away and there's still so much to do! Ack! They're not joking when they say going away can be more stressful than everyday life.

Are your bills paid off? It would be un-Christ-like to leave our godless "friends" and relatives with a pile of debt. Have you packed? Personally I'm only taking light sweaters and leaving my bathing suits behind, because others will make better use of them than I when they're burning in hell. How about your pets, though? Have you thought of this? Where will they go? I mean, we love our little puppies and kitties to pieces, but contrary to what the movie tells us, all dogs do not go to heaven. Because, according to one biblical prophecy site, they don't have souls.

This is a tough one. We need someone who is evil enough not to be invited to Jesus's kingdom, but not too evil as, well, we're leaving our shih tzus with them. We need ... someone like Bart Centre and Eternal Earth-Bound Pets!

Bart Centre, a stupid (but not too stupid) atheist, is the go-to guy for all your post-Rapture pet needs. For a small fee of $135, he and his staff of 44 will care for all your four-legged friends while you're off playing 18 holes with JC. Peace of mind for under 200 bucks? Where do I sign? If I were you I'd hurry, though, as the Rapture is almost upon us and 258 people have already nabbed spots.

I know what some of you are thinking, and you have every right: How in the heck is any sort of business going to be able to function properly when death and destruction come crashing down on Saturday? This is where personal choice comes in. If you're a spokesperson for Family Radio, this is your belief and you wouldn't dare shell out the cash to a completely futile company. Others may be thinking: Well, I don't necessarily think the world will burn after I rise, but leave my pet with a non-believer? That doesn't exactly sit right with me. The same biblical website that told us our pets don't have souls voiced their concern about this, too, saying:

A lot of persons are concerned about their pets, but I don't know if they should necessarily trust atheists to take care of them.

These are all valid points, people. All things that should be carefully thought through. Discuss them with your loved ones. Make a pro and con list. Be thorough. This girl, though? She's not taking any chances. I've already signed my little guy up for Eternal Earth Bound Pets. I mean, it's just money. And it's a different currency in Heaven anyway, duh.

What are you doing with your pet on doomsday?

 

Image via mikebaird/Flickr

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TC00 TC00

Me and my pets will be enjoying another lazy Saturday and laughing at the ones that truly believe the world is going to end Saturday


Now what would be funny though would be if a natural disastor would strike saturday, of course it wouldn't be funny to the people it affected, but I'm sure this wacko group would blame it on God and try to convery more people into believing the world is ending...well at least until Sunday morning comes around

nonmember avatar Bob

God isn't real.

MaggieCC MaggieCC

Atheists don't believe that the rapture will happen right? So they are selling something they think will NOT happen.  They are in essence scamming christians here - I will hand it to them it is BRILLIANT! So, when the rapture does happen, will they write it off as something else - say an alien abduction, and then NOT honor their agreement? 


I will simply have to trust that the Lord Almighty has this covered and will not let the pets of ALL his faithful servants suffer needlessly.

nonmember avatar Lisa Wiegandt

I think all puppies go to heaven and all cats go the hot place cuz they are demons :)

nonmember avatar deal or no deal

Maggie, maybe you are right. Every major culture, race, religion have predicted something major to happen around 2012. But don't agree that good or bad can be classified by one's belief. One may be an atheist but a better human being than a believer. Guess the pets will be safe with them.

nonmember avatar KMac

deal or no deal: I think it's reaching a little to say "every" major culture, race, religion. Camping is kind of out there on his own with his prediction; he has followers, but what I'm seeing is that the majority (if not all?) of other Christians disagree with his 'prediction.' And modern Mayans say the Mayan calendar ending wasn't intended to be catastrophic or the end of the world. So don't buy into the hype!

nonmember avatar Lexy Bernard

Whatever idiot just wrote that "cats are demons" deserves to die. I have my first feline ever and he happens to be the best FAMILIAR ever. Wake up to reality, freak.

nonmember avatar dani

I don't think All Dogs Go to Heaven is a Disney movie...

mesai mesai

Umm. That wasn't a Disney movie. It was a Don Bluth Film, released by UNITED ARTISTS. Don Bluth is a former animator for Walt Disney Studios... and yes, that's all I took away from this particular post...

nonmember avatar kevobx

God tell us to beaware of dogs, they always return back to their own vomit. Why are people so terrified of the scriptures of 21? Matthew and Luke 23:21

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