Democrat Maria Shriver Deserves Break From Republican Husband

Jeanne Sager

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria ShriverSo you've heard the news. Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger have decided to separate after 25 years of marriage. Sad story. For them. For their kids. But at the risk of sounding flip, did anyone not see this coming?

She campaigned for Obama. He thinks the pres and his ilk are "girlie men." Even Disney hasn't been able to come up with a plausible donkey/elephant happily ever after, did we really think Conan the Barbarian and a Kennedy could work that one out?

Oh come on, people! We love to talk about opposites attracting. It makes for good rom-coms. But when's the last time you admitted to picking a guy because he fit the cheesy flick archetype?

Here's what real opposites look like: She is a bleeding heart liberal who shops at the farmers' market, organic only, thank you very much, and invites the boys down the street to be the kids' new "guncles." He reserves the word "bleeding" for his steak. His version of organic eats is asking that said steak be so rare that someone slapped the ass of a cow and sent it bounding into the restaurant dining room. And he's OK with those gays playing pocket pool, as long as "they don't play any away games with me."

Now say this match made in a bar with beer goggles wants to take a vacation? Well a trip outside the country is out, although Ms. Blue more than likely has a passport (along with 59 percent of other "solid liberals" under the Pew Research Center's criteria), Mr. Red doesn't need to travel overseas unless it's on the hunt of a certain OB/GYN in Kenya, and then he'll borrow her digital camera to bring back evidence. And he certainly isn't going to fly anywhere, because gosh darnit that's where them terrorists are just itchin' to get us.

Which leaves a road trip. And the inevitable battle over the radio. NPR? Rush Limbaugh? NPR? Rush Limbaugh?

A taste of the car convo:

From Mr. Red: Gosh darnit, woman, did you have to pack those "good for me" crackers? Where are those greasy chips I told you to stockpile in the back of the gas guzzler SUV that you bitched and moaned about taking but eventually were very happy to fill with your Birkenstocks and the extra pairs of rag wool socks. (You're right, it does get cold on Nantucket nights -- but you just HAD to go there. I thought the Hamptons was fine.)

From Ms. Lib: Well if we'd taken the hybrid, we'd have saved enough on gas to spend the entire week in the Hamptons. But nooooooo.

Folks that's one vacation (and yes, I MADE IT UP -- for the Fox News watchers out there, this is NOT a real conversation between Schwarzenegger and Shriver or any one Democrat/Republican I know ... even one who thinks he has a lead on the "real" birth certificate). Add four kids on one of these vacations, and I say we're talking two saints to have made it this far. The fact is, for 25 years, these two haven't had much more in common than the first letter of their last names, and the four kids who Shriver pledges will continue to remain the lights of their lives. It's about time this Republican and this Democrat had a little time off to escape the constant bickering (even if it was just an argument in their own heads).

Can you see one of these mixed marriages making it for the long haul? What's the major sticking point for you with your spouse on politics?


Image via schumachergirl1956/Flickr

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