Scorned Bride Dominique Buttitta & Her Groom's Costly Cold Feet

14


Heather Murphy-Raines/Scout's Honor
I cannot imagine spending $100,000 on a wedding. I cannot imagine then being left at the altar. Consider me the lucky one. Dominique Buttitta, a suburban Chicago attorney, was not so fortunate. 

Double dose of unlucky.

Not one to take it lying down, Ms. Buttitta may not have her ex-fiancee, who dumped her a mere four days before the ceremony, but she plans to get every last penny back.

Yes, that's right. She is suing her ex-fiance for emotional distress.

As Ms. Buttitta wrote in the letter notifying Salerno of the lawsuit:

It was agreed by you and me that the marriage ceremony was to be performed on October 2, 2010. I was on that date, ready and willing to marry you. Further, please be advised that I am not still willing to marry you.

Yep, a breach of contract is her strategy. I am sure there are millions of jilted brides around the country (and their parents' empty wallets) shouting a rousing huzzah!

Yep, she is kicking ass, taking wallets, and setting precedents. On the topic of precedents, this won't be the first time a jilted bride gets her revenge:

Good for you, Dominique Buttitta. Good for you. Breaking it off was his decision, but leaving you with the bill is just plain wrong.

I don't call this sour grapes. I call this natural consequences. This is a lesson her ex-fiancee should have learned in the third grade. Do the right thing, or perhaps someone -- in this case, a court of law -- may do it for you.

As for Dominique Buttitta, let's hope she realizes she was lucky to have escaped such a man ... and perhaps might be bit more thrifty when she plans her next wedding.

How much was your wedding? Weddings gets more and more expensive every year. Would you ask for repayment if you or your child was left at the altar?


feminism, in the news, marriage, breakups

14 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

Joanna McKenna

Sorry, but traditionally the bride and/or her parents foot the bill for the wedding, even if the intended groom bolts at the last minute.  I'm guessing one of the reasons this one got cold feet was the idea of an extraveganza, NOT a wedding, and that Buttitta would bankrupt HIM after they married.  If she'd been paying attention, he probably gave her MANY clues that he wouldn't make it to the altar.  I hope she never collects a dime.

nonmember avatar Pbuttercup

Joanna, as someone who was dumped 2 weeks before their wedding, I read this and thought, "this is what my parents should have done". You have no idea the permanent emotional damage something like that can do to a person. It has been almost 5 years since that and it still makes me cry at odd moments. And there were no fights or even a big fight to lead up to that moment, he just didn't feel like it anymore. I was given no clues, we had lived together for 9 months and not once during that time did any red flags appear. Our wedding would have been relatively in expensive (I think it was around the $3,000 mark give or take) thankfully. But many are not like that and it is a huge financial blow and emotional blow when something like that happens. I have to say, my family handled it all very well with grace and understanding.
So until you have been there, I don't think what you are saying is very validated. It hurts. forever. And if getting some of that money back helps them, then I say go for it.

klgomez klgomez

I don't see how anyone could blame her, he was clearly a jerk and in the wrong.  What kind of guy breaks it off with a woman 4 DAYS before the wedding?  If she had left him everyone would expect her to give him back the ring so why shouldn't he pay her (or her parents, which it does not say they helped) back for wasting her time and her money.  

nonmember avatar You're Welcome

Now she knows how it feels to be hit by a divorce. Welcome to the world that men have to deal with. You'll be seeing a lot more of this in the future, thanks to no-fault divorce, and the fact that guys are waking up to the raw deal marriage now gives them.

nonmember avatar nosantaeither

"Do the right thing?" What the heck is the right thing here? Telling her you don't want to get married? Yep, he did that. Going through with a marriage you no longer want? Nope. Paying the full cost of the wedding? Nope, there are two people in a relationship. Paying for half of what you'd agreed to spend on the wedding? Yep. Paying for emotional distress? Nope, see the line about two people responsibly for any failed relationship.

The emotional distress line in the article and in the comments are just ridiculous. Since playschool we've all learned that relationships carry emotional risk, whether it's a break up after 20 years, days before the wedding, or a blind date who doesn't call back. It's part of the deal, you don't get compensated if the risk you volunteered to take doesn't pay off. If life hadn't taught the dumped fiancees that, then the 50% divorce rate should have. That's if they remember that a wedding leads to a marriage.

nonmember avatar Babs

Life is tough, wear a helmet, missy. Hopefully if you get engaged again, you'll grow a brain and get married by the justice of peace for 100$. Seriously, I don't have an ounce of sympathy for some dumb broad who shells out 100K for a wedding; stupid folks don't deserve to have money, and they invent the most creative ways to blow it all. Duh.

nonmember avatar Jeff Common

What's the difference in this and some dude forking out a ton for an anniversary trip and the wife leaves him at the last minute?

What's the dude's story? Did she sleep with the best man or something? Why did he feel the need to not get married?

Frankly, I'm surprised at some of the comments considering the no-fault divorce laws that are widely promoted as good things in society...and a heckuva lot more expensive in the long run.

nonmember avatar Jan

Yes, Dominique is suffering from emotional distress. But frugality and saving for one's future, let alone saving to help out someone truly in need, has some merit, you know. I tried to bring a law suit against the city of Cordova, Alaska for the loss of our house - because the city has a culvert that takes runoff from a 4,000-foot mountain range. The culvert was just 15 feet under our house, and the city never maintained it nor ever fixed the leaks. Finding out about the leaking culvert and literally losing our house because of the sinkhole under it, it began to collapse. We had to pay thousands to have it torn down. Three different real estate attorneys refused to take on our case, claiming we didn't have enough of a case to win against a city government! We lost over $70,000 and our son's college funds I'd been saving up for over the last 20 years! Now, THAT is financial and emotional distress. And no one has offered any support for us and our plight. We didn't put that culvert there and we still got stuck with the bill. Dominique made choices to spend that kind of money, but she's getting all kinds of publicity and legal support. And she'll probably get compensated. I hope she learns to be more frugal in the future - she could certainly call me and get some advice!

nonmember avatar kalmmom

Whiney broad - she spent 100k on a wedding, she's just pissed she didn't get to go through with it and show off everything to everyone so that they would all think her life was perfect. Now everyone knows something was wrong in the relationship and she's mad - I hate that it happened and I am sure she is quite upset but to sue and get MORE then what she put into it is ridiculous in my opinion.

squish squish

Wow, I can't believe that a jury actually awarded her so much money. SHE chose to leave her 80k job. SHE then chose a 100k wedding on a 30k budget. And now she is rewarded for her irresponsibility. Half, no more, no less, should have been awarded.


Is the man going to counter-sue? I am sure he is feeling some "emotional distress" as well for being stuck with the whole bill, yet no wife.

1-10 of 14 comments 12 Last