What Life in the Crate & Barrel Catalog Really Looks Like (PHOTOS)

Adriana Velez | Mar 19, 2014 Home & Garden

crate & barrelWith spring's arrival I find myself flipping through the Crate & Barrel catalog, looking for inspiration. My kitchen could use some refreshing. What could I possibly buy to up my cooking and entertaining game? So much! If only I had forever-deep pockets and the lifestyle to go with them. Apparently this is how one should be living -- quiet moments with your perfectly-made single-serving coffee and wild cocktail parties. The Crate & Barrel lifestyle is the one for me. In my next life.

  • So. Many. Berries.

    1

    Recipe for fruit salad: Take someone else's fruit salad. Throw out all the unpeeled grapes, Styrofoam cantaloupe, browning bananas, and other undesirable fruits. Leave only the berries. Enjoy.

  • The Cocktail Bar From 'Mad Men'

    2

    Perfect for all those late-night cocktail parties I'm never throwing!

  • Wine Cabinet of My Dreams

    3

    So this is my dream: Not only do I keep EXTRA bottles of wine around, but they're all stored in this cabinet with stemware. That's right, a piece of storage furniture purchased just to facilitate drinking. That's brilliant.

  • Lemonade for the Guests

    4

    Hostess tip: Always keep lemonade and fresh sprigs of mint on hand to serve upon a silver tray to drop-in guests. I mean, when you're not working at your job and taking care of your children and stuff.

  • Magical Kitchen Linens

    5

    They never stain, they never fade. Every night little fairies wash and fold them all for you.

  • I Made These Iced Cookies for You

    6

    Every bunny, chick, and lamby is utter perfection. But you can't eat any of them because that would ruin the whole effect.

  • Childproof Seersucker

    7

    Oh sure, serve brunch on this seersucker tablecloth. I'm certain there won't be any stains left. Just make sure there are no children at the table, either. Your best bet is to avoid serving any food or drink at all, actually.

  • Bundt Cakes for Everyone

    8

    Who me? Oh, I spend all my days using my gorgeous pistachio standing mixer to make multiple bundt cakes. Want one?

  • Egg Necessity

    9

    Don't even bother serving deviled eggs without this platter.

  • Single-Serve Coffee Because You Deserve It

    10

    Yes, you really do need this whole machine to make yourself just one cup of coffee.

  • Proper Stemware

    11

    I'm sorry, you serve your pinot green-o in the same glass that you use for chianti? You barbarian!

  • The Salt Cellar Made From Wood Whose Name You Can't Pronounce

    12

    Only an asshole would keep their salt in a cellar made from non-sustainable wood.

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