What Life in the Williams-Sonoma Catalog Really Looks Like (PHOTOS)

Adriana Velez | Feb 25, 2014 Home & Garden

williams sonomaOh Williams-Sonoma catalog, I want to live in you. In Williams-Sonoma Land, perfect meals are created with artisan condiments and organic vegetables purchased from the farmer's market. Lobsters are plentiful. And the pastries, my God, the pastries. They look like the food of gods. Did I mention there is never a mess in sight, despite all this ambitious cooking? Nothing but gleaming, $400 pots and pans, everywhere. Let's go visit, shall we?

Tell us, has your culinary life ever achieved such splendor?

 

Image via Williams-Sonoma

  • Painless Cheese Grating

    1

    I'm sorry, what's this green-can parmesan cheese of which you speak? We grate ours fresh, and never a knuckle is scraped.

  • 'Hoppy' Perfect Easter Cupcakes to You

    2

    Doesn't everyone have a whole shelf full of milky white cake stands just waiting to be filled with perfectly frosted pastel cupcakes? I know I do. Right next to the little paper bunny rabbit toppers. Yup.

  • Can Your Food the Gorgeous Way Or Don't Bother

    3

    Honestly, why would you bother canning the beautiful fruits of the harvest in anything BUT Weck jars. Obviously I grew everything you see here in my organic garden.

  • What's Missing From Your Life: Spiralized Food

    4

    Oh, you don't have a Paderno Spiralizer? Your poor vegetables. Dicing is for plebes. By the way, it won't take your housemaid much time at all to clean this thing. Not that it matters to you!

  • God's Pantry

    5

    Oh yeah, my pantry looks just like this -- unpainted Swedish wood shelves in a big, sunlit room with matching jars of everything you need. Yup. Definitely my kitchen here.

  • Bunny Monster Cake

    6

    What the hell is this?!? It's a cake -- that stands on one end? And there's cookie dirt? I cannot with this cake. I just cannot.

  • You're Doing Baby Food All Wrong

    7

    Just so you know? Your baby food is shitty. It should be homemade, and it should be presented in little flower cups, as you can see here. Your child is going to grow up to be a mouth-breather mass murderer if you keep feeding him that crap from the jars. Don't you care?!?

  • All of the Le Creuset Are Belong to Me

    8

    Because you own so much French enamel cast iron cookery, you have to arrange it all in rainbow order.

  • Only Losers Roast 1 Chicken at a Time

    9

    If you're fancy you'll roast two chickens at a time. By the way, I can actually smell that chicken with the lemon slices and everything. I guess this person doesn't do grocery store rotisserie?

     

  • My Last Cocktail Party

    10

    It was super easy -- I just served some Turkish mezze bites. As one does.

  • Pomegranates Just Lying Around

    11

    Honestly, I don't understand why more people don't make their own pasta fresh. It's a snap!

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