Ever wonder what celebs are like in person? Whether or not they're civilized and treat everyone else like human beings, what they smell like, how they decorate their homes? Every so often an ordinary mortal comes in contact with one of these etherial beings. And if we're very lucky, they spill details. Recently, novelist Peter Mountford wrote about his experiences selling furniture to celebrities while working a day job at an LA store.
I know what you're thinking. You want to find out who bought what and which star is the biggest jerk, but there are all those words! Well, never fear. I've distilled this narrative into its most important nuggets of gossip -- like who bought a $5,000 mink throw just before divorcing her TV star husband. You're welcome.
Who: Bridget Fonda, married to Danny Elfman. What: Everything, apparently, especially big decorative pots.
Who: Victoria Beckham. What: Mountford is not saying, but he mentions that she wears her sunglasses indoors, even through lunch.
Who: David Schwimmer. What: Mountford's not saying, but describes him as "precisely as bitter and patronizing as you'd expect him to be." Ouch.
Who: Sharon Stone. What: Missoni bathrobe and several $250 coral-encrusted pillows. She was "bitchy and magnificent. A bombshell even without her makeup."
Who: Linda Hunt (character actress who voiced Edna Mode in The Incredibles). What: Almost bought some wicker chairs. Teeny tiny, super cool.
Who: Jennifer Lopez and then-fiancé Marc Anthony. What: 50 napkin rings. Also wanted 50 dainty teacups, but the store's were not dainty enough. Turns out they were for their wedding. JLo was sweet but Marc just glowered and paid for everything with his black AmEx.
Who: Rebecca Romjin just before she dumped John Stamos. What: $5,000 mink throw.
Conclusion: What have we learned? Stars, they're just like us. Stars are not just like us, except that they do buy furniture and housewares. Some are pleasant, some are not, all of them have nicer stuff that ours.
Are there any celebrities you would dare to stalk if you spotted them at a furniture store -- just to see what they bought?
Image via DrLeonards.com