16 Things I'm Ashamed to Admit I'm Thankful For

LOL 30

Yesterday, I was sent a group email asking me to list things I’m thankful for that aren’t traditional, like: "my family," "food on the table," etc. Other moms on the email tree were coming back with beautiful sentiments about new friendships, the help of strangers, and averting disasters.

I didn’t respond because everything I thought of seemed trite, superficial, and a tad less profound.  However, I did write a list, and frankly, I'll share it with you because these things totally deserve thanks in my book -- just refrain from saying them around the dinner table.

1. I am thankful for the dimmer switch in my bedroom.

2. I am thankful that I keep a pair of tweezers in my car.

3. I am thankful my daughter has not lost faith in the tooth fairy, and my son goes along with it.

4. I am thankful I didn't have an affair with the head of the CIA.

5. I am thankful for Homeland -- somehow that red-headed guy is really sexy?!

6. I am thankful for those awesome skinny hangers that make my closet seem bigger.

7. I am thankful for stars like Courteney Cox, Jennifer Aniston, and J.Lo., who make 40 seem not so old.

8. I am thankful for The Voice, but mostly Adam Levine (who I've realized is the Jewish mom's Jon Hamm).

9. I am thankful for the pictures of Jon Hamm's penis that are still circulating on the Internet (even though "Hamm" is not kosher).

10. I am thankful for indoor plumbing and electricity (see Sandy).

11. I am thankful my kids have figured out how to buckle seat belts, wipe themselves, and use step stools to reach things.

12. I am thankful they still ask me to lie with them at bedtime.

13. I am thankful burgundy is the new black -- it's really the unsung hero of slimming colors.

14. I am thankful Lisa Whelchel was on Survivor -- I'd been waiting for a comeback since The Facts of Life (fingers crossed they get Tootie next season).

15. I am thankful that Fifty Shades of Grey brought vibrators into the bedroom.

16. I am thankful for the $20 bill I found in my jeans yesterday -- that's always exciting.

I'm thankful for traditional stuff too, but it's super cathartic to mention the stuff that might get you kicked out of Thanksgiving dinner.

Try it, I promise not to judge. What is the most nontraditional thing you're thankful for?


Image via Best Norman Rockwell Art

confessions, family, entertaining, holiday decorating, family meals, holiday entertaining, thanksgiving, traditions, mommy bloggers, humor