The Best Way to Get Rid of Mice (and Men) for Good


mouse photo'Tis the season for mice to turn up in your house, like those unwanted holiday guests who outstay their welcome. Apparently in some parts of the country (hello, East Coast), it's been so rainy that the critters are being driven out of their soggy little holes in the ground and coming into our nice, dry homes in greater numbers than usual this year.

A few of my poor friends at work have had to deal with this phenomenon firsthand, with one colleague having an army of mice move in until she could get an outside exterminator to plug up all the holes in the walls in her apartment in New York.

It reminds me of the time I suddenly found myself face to face with my own mouse intruder in my own Manhattan apartment. I'd like to think I came up with a pretty creative -- and obvious -- way to scare the little guy off.

It's simple, really. I lectured him. Well, first I screamed, like any self-respecting girly-girl would do. And then I lectured him (or maybe it was a her? I doubt it, though). Anyway, he was sitting there, frozen under a dining table chair, and I bent down so that my huge human face was close to his tiny furry rodent one.

"What do you think you're doing here? You don't belong here!" I told him sternly as he stared at me with frightened black eyes, his whiskers twitching faintly. "You need to get out right now and never come back!"

I'm embarrassed to say it, but I think I even wagged a finger at him.

The thing is, though, it worked like a charm. After staring and twitching for a good minute longer, the mouse turned around and scampered under a counter. I never saw him again, and I never got a surprise visit from any of his relatives, either.

But it's not all that shocking when you think about it. I mean, the same tactic -- lecturing, finger-wagging, voice-raising -- is also the perfect way to chase a man away. Or at least stun him into silence for a while until he retreats, tail between his legs. So why wouldn't it work on mice too?

All I'm suggesting is this: If one day you find yourself with a mouse problem, forget the traps and the exterminator. Don't bother going out and getting a cat. All you need to do is lecture the little beast for a while until you've made your point and he scurries off. I doubt he'll ever be back. Would you want to be the brunt of a lecture like that twice in a row? Didn't think so. And if you're trying to get rid of a guy -- or at least make him back down during a heated discussion? Do the exact same thing. I'm telling you, it's pure magic.

What do you do to get rid of pesky mice ... and men?


Image via Brian_Kellet/Flickr

home safety, home life


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Doomy234 Doomy234

Well, the past few years we had a cat to catch whatever unsuspecting mice tried to invade our home. Unfortunately, she passed away a few months ago. We have a kitten, but he is still just figuring out where I am going to set his food bowl, and just now successfully capturing what grasshoppers hop in his path. Not sure if he will be stopping any mice.

But hey, when puddy tat fails, bring in the rat poison and mouse traps. Those mice wont stand a chance. Muahaha.

Zamaria Zamaria

Um. I hate to tell you this, but you probably still have mice. They just stay hidden. We had a cat that caught ours, but she passed away last year. We have a male cat now, and he's not really interested in the mice. So we are using glue traps right now. Hopefully we can find another cat soon, but all the females at the shelter lately have been uncomfortable around kids. :-/

ceciliam ceciliam

Hhhhhmmmm, I don't have a mice....or man, problem:)

EBee12 EBee12

Cats. Cats that love to hunt (since not all do). Since we got our cats, we had one mouse once, they caught it, end of story.

Kayla... KaylaMillar

i dont have a mice or man problem! =)

mommy... mommyme2440

DO NOT USE POISON IF YOU HAVE A CAT OR DOG!!! Cats that will not hunt the mice may still eat dead mice that they find. Some dogs will too. We lost 2 dogs when I was younger before my mom figured that out.

mille... millerbunch

well i'd rather snap it's scrawny neck.. that's just me though

tuffy... tuffymama

I hope this was intendedto be humorous. That mouse and his bajillion cousins were still living in your house, and that is NO way for a grown-ass woman to treat a man. You get what you give.

Bmat Bmat

That's one scary mouse! Field mice are cute. We have to use poison. I refuse to use glue or spring traps- at least with poison they get sick and die. With spring or glue traps they are tortured unless the spring kills them. We tried the no-kill traps, but we couldn't control them enough.

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