Choreplay: The Secret to Getting Him To Do Housework

guy with vacuumAfter a long day at work or taking care of the kids, the last thing you feel like doing is more cooking and cleaning. If only there were someone who could help you out around the house.

Wait, there is -- your husand (boyfriend, live-in lover). But getting him to actually pitch in is another matter. Sigh. Wouldn't it be great if there were a way you could actually make him want to help with the housework?

There is. It's called choreplay, also known as the fine art of housework as foreplay. That's right ladies, I'm talkiing about trading sex for chores. I'm talking about letting your husband see how "aroused" you become just by watching him do the dishes or clean out the toilet bowl.


With choreplay, each chore he does gets you a little more excited -- and him a little closer to the bedroom. (Unless of course, you're kitchen floor types, in which case, the chore in question should probably be mopping.)

Just for fun, and his benefit, let’s take a look at how choreplay works. Here's a quick score sheet that your guy can use to see which chores are most likely to land you in bed. You can customize your own list and corresponding scores and post it on the fridge -- you know, just as a reminder. For every additional point he puts together, that’s one less chore you have to do, and one more chance of a romantic encounter.

Chores are like foreplay points: put together the enough points and you can achieve the perfect score -- and by that I mean, you can score.

Vacuuming -- Sooo tedious and just the hauling out and putting away of the vacuum is enough to stress you out. 2 foreplay points

Dishes -- Just looking at a sink full of dirty dishes is stressful, let alone actually having to dig into all that crusty food. A sparkling clean sink and dishwasher already on the rinse cycle? 3 foreplay points

School lunches – By the time you get around to putting these together at night, the kids just lucky not to end up with a box of macaroni and milk in a mason jar. It’s easily one of the last things you want to worry about at the end of the day. 4 foreplay points

Dinner -- If dinner is in the oven -- or even close to being in the oven -- one of your biggest end-of-day stresses is taken care of. You suddenly have time for a bubble bath! This one counts for major foreplay points. 6 points

Laundry -- Laundry is the never-ending story of any household. It always needs doing, it always needs folding. And the putting away -- argh! That’s the worst part. Just one day of coming home to laundry completed, folded and put away is a serious score. 5 points (add one additional foreplay point if your clothes for the next day are already ironed and hung)

Now let's see what your husband gets in return for all those choreplay points he's been banking:

1-3 points: Steamy make out session
4-5 points: Make out session with oral (for both of you!)
6-7 points: Oral plus actual sex (what guy's gonna argue with that?)
8-9 points: Sex in a new position
10+ points: The sky's the limit! Costumes, roleplay, a little S & M.... whatever you two crazy lovers can come up with -- after all, he's earned it!

If it sounds like he's doing all the winning here, just remember: the more points he earns, the more he's pitched in around the house. Dishes? Done! And just for the price of a few kisses. Now if he goes crazy and cleans the entire house, well, it's up to you to decide how to reward that one.

How do you get  your partner to help out more at home?

Image via Rob Boudon/Flickr


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