POSTS WITH TAG: self esteem

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    There are always going to be mean people in the world who think it's within their right to say inappropriate things to you -- whether you're overweight, underweight, or the perfect weight. Cearra Swetman was out to dinner a year ago when she had the misfortune of running into a big jerk who felt compelled to remark that the Hooters chain restaurant T-shirt she was wearing should not be worn on a girl her size. Cearra weighed almost 250 pounds at the time. Instead of telling him to mind his own beeswax, she used his comment as inspiration to drop a remarkable 130 pounds. Good for her! But what she did after losing all of that weight makes me a little sad.

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    Gabourey Sidibe just became my favorite person on the Internet. Keep on reading, she's about to become yours too. On May 1 in New York City, the American Horror Story actress gave the most awesomest of awesome speeches on the topic of confidence.

    First things first -- don't ask her how she's so confident. "I hate that," she mused. "I always wonder if that's the first thing they ask Rihanna when they meet her. 'RiRi! How are you so confident?' Nope. No. No. But me? They ask me with that same incredulous disbelief every single time. 'You seem so confident! How is that?'"

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    I've done my fair share of eye-rolling when I see moms with huge fake breasts. I mean, the risk of surgery alone would be enough to deter me from having an elective cosmetic operation, but I could also think of about 4,000 other things that would be more worthy of spending that kind of money on than new big boobs.

    And honestly, are those women really doing it for themselves like they say?

    But after four kids and the pregnancy weight gain and weight loss, I have to admit that I now understand why women do it.

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    I have a little confession to make, since I'm (mostly) all about keeping it real up in here. You see, I really, really love food. Like, ridiculously love food. You know the saying, "some people eat to live and others live to eat"? I don't even understand that first group. People that say they're so busy they forgot to eat? They might as well be speaking Greek. Mmmm, Greek yogurt. Wait, what?

    Anyway, not only do I love to eat, but I'm a stress eater. This one time in college, a friend said she always got really skinny after a breakup, because she couldn't eat when she was sad. I was all -- but, but, but ... ice cream!

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    Women have complicated relationships with each other. Any girl who has gone through middle school knows this. One day, someone is your best friend. The next, you are persona non grata. Problem is, it's now happening to more and more grownups too. It hurts no matter how old we are, noted Sarah Jessica Parker in a new interview with British Harper's Bazaar. According to the Sex and the City star, women are more cruel to each other now than ever. And she's right. So when did this mean girl behavior become the rule rather than the exception?

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    Does this sound like you when you’re talking about your fitness? "I’m so out of shape." "I’m fat." "I could never do that." "I’m so slow/weak/unfit."

    I’d guess you don’t realize how often you’re saying these kinds of negative things about yourself. Whether you’re just listening to an internal critic or voicing your criticism aloud, it’s a huge detriment to your confidence and hinders your work out progress. Negative self-talk can become self-fulfilling prophecy -- if you tell yourself you're likely to fail, you probably will. With a positive attitude, you're less likely to give up on a workout and you're more likely to give it your all.

    If you want to get more out of hitting the gym, it's time to kill the negative self-talk. Don't know how? Here are 8 ways to kick negativity out of the way so it doesn't kill your workout.

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    I have a love-hate relationship with HBO's Girls. I loved the first season, sort of hated the second, and now I'm just not sure how I feel about the third. But I watch it nonetheless. 

    I don't generally take much away from the episodes, other than feeling glad I'm not a 20-something anymore. After watching the episode two weeks ago when Hannah spent almost the entire time in a small green string bikini, I sort of had an epiphany about postpartum bodies, even though Lena Dunham has yet to have any babies herself.

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    Stand-up comic Erin Keaney is a far braver woman than I, and I think she may be my hero right now. The 43-year-old mom of two recently uploaded her hilarious “Muffin Top” video to YouTube to preach about body acceptance.

    I love when people can accept their flaws -- perceived or real  -- and chose to laugh at them. Let’s face it, most of us, especially us mamas, have a little bit of a muffin top going on. Spanx wouldn’t be a thing if we didn’t.

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    Do you ever see that woman who walks into a room and commands attention because of her confidence? Just by looking at her, you find it difficult to imagine she is ever nervous or unsure of herself. Confidence is such an important facet of success -- it’s not that you’re always sure you’ll succeed, but that you will have no problem handling the outcome if you fail. 

    As a personal trainer, I’ve seen firsthand the importance of confidence when it comes to achieving results from working out. The gym or any kind of new fitness endeavour can be terribly nerve-wracking for many people, and the catch-22 is that having confidence can help you succeed at your fitness goals. So, I asked a few of my confident female friends for their best advice on how they manage to be such confident women. Here’s their advice to use in life AND in the gym:

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    Two-time breast cancer survivor, 35-year-old Hannah Foxley, said her world was forever changed when she found out she had a lump in her breast back in April 2011. "I was grieving for my father, Bill, who’d died five months earlier, when I found a lump in my breast and was diagnosed with cancer. It was like being hit by a train. It didn’t feel real. Like most young women, I thought I was invincible," she told Cosmopolitan UK.

    She had a lumpectomy and eight cycles of chemotherapy. Then, a week before her treatment was due to end, she found a second malignant lump. So then Hannah had a mastectomy, followed by five weeks of radiotherapy. The entire process has been grueling and heart-rending to say the least, but make no mistake: Foxley is a fighter who isn't backing down and refuses to be anything less than positive. So much so that she chose to pose naked in Cosmo, revealing what her body looks like today.

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