Would You Use a Male Midwife?

on July 8, 2009 at 4:12 PM

martinsmom2008

There are lots of discussions around CafeMom about whether it's better to have a male or female OBGYN or professional treat you in matters of reproductive health and childbirth.

Here are just a few:

Male or female doctors?

Which sex is better?

Many moms say they prefer midwives because of the more natural approach and because they can relate better to what they are going through. From the gist of these conversations, the midwives these moms are talking about are women.

So here's another question ... would you use a male midwife?

They do exist. You can Google it. You'll find a few blogs from guys who say they feel discriminated against, both by others in their profession and patients, for being a man. "Midwife," by the way, translates to "with woman," so it's still the correct term regardless of the practitioner's gender.

If you use a midwife, is it partly because of her gender? What would be the difference if that person was a man?

About the author Cynthia Dermody

is The Stir's Managing Editor who has trophies in her home for her skills at the Irish Jig. She makes cupcakes with as many fattening ingredients as possible, doesn't comb her hair for months at a time, and was probably a faerie in a former life.

Filed Under: obgyn

Comments (11)

codysmama2609

on Jul 8, 2009 at 4:57 PM

i was thinking about this the other day. and what do they call themselves? midman? anyways not any man could be a midwife. and they have to expect to go through this. male massage therapists can also have a very hard time because they are men... i thinks thats just how it is right now.

so i voted no, buuuuut.... if there was a man that was that intuned to a woman's body especially while pregnant and so many other things, i miiight consider it...but prob not.

like i would probably want a midwife that has already been through childbirth herself not just attended many births and studied and taken tests. that my opinion and my decision in the end

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youngmm

on Jul 8, 2009 at 5:46 PM

I wouldn't care. A doctor is a doctor.

DreaKevAiyana

on Jul 8, 2009 at 7:39 PM

It would definitely depend on the man. I had an amazing midwife with my daughter but unfortunately she moved away right after I gave birth, so I'm very reluctant to get pregnant again because there are only a few midwives around here. Just like any doctor, if I'm comfortable with him/her then i'd be all for it. I have a male holistic chiropractor that I loooove and would definitely use him if he were a midwife (he's in his 60s!!).

4kidz916

on Jul 8, 2009 at 9:24 PM

I'm not having any more kids but I would have definately been up for a male midwife if he was qualified and caring. 2 of my kids were delivered by male doctors and they were perfectly fine. The third was delivered by a female midwife and the fourth by the hospital nurses because she came before the midwife could get to the hospital.

kelsbug05

on Jul 8, 2009 at 9:50 PM

I have a male midwife and hes the greatest doctor i had. I switched at 28 weeks because i do not like the way the obgyn office works with all the doctors. He is so personal and your in control of everything. So yes i have one and would recommend one.

benniswife

on Jul 9, 2009 at 12:08 AM

Not only no but HELL NO! I have been physically hurt by male doctors too many times during a PAP exam and they treat you like you are brainless and don't know your body. They also never listen to anything you have to say when it comes to your body.

KyleeTrogolo

on Jul 9, 2009 at 2:46 AM

i wouldn't. i've had a few male docs do paps on me and always hurt more than it should, one even continued the exam as i was crying from the pain and being freaked out. he was discussing football with the nurse while he was jabbing away at my insides. (yes, i reported him) the female doctors/midwifes i use now are so much nicer and they always stop if i act like i'm a little uncomfortable.

LuminousMom

on Jul 9, 2009 at 12:58 PM

sure, why not? I had male doctors and male nurses when I had both my daughter and my son... one of the nurses in the NICU (where we were for two weeks with my DD) was a male and he was the kindest gentlest nurse there... My doctor when I had Sidda was like "Hey, I dont know what its like to give birth.. but I have four kids of my own and I know from helping women all these years what they say it feels like.. so I am here to help you feel your best" and I really liked that.. he admitted up front, you gotta TELL me what you need so I can help you.

My SIL's doctor was a woman and kinda acted like "Oh I've been there, its not that bad" thats not what you want to hear when you are pushing out a 10 pound baby, lol. I mean for each their own but to me.. a doctor is a doctor..a midwife is a midwife.. doesnt matter their sex.

Mookie74

on Jul 9, 2009 at 8:12 PM

There's too much discrimination in the world. I would freely use a male midwife if a) that person was good at their position and b) I felt I had a good rapport with them (the most important thing really). There's good and bad in every industry but just because someone is a different sex, doesn't mean that they do their job any less than anyone else. Sometimes, a different persepective can be very helpful in some situations.

squish

on Oct 11, 2009 at 12:53 AM

I would prefer a female, but if the choice was between a female OB and a male midwife, I would most definitely choose the male, considering that both candidates were well qualified and caring in their respective professions.