15 Things Lifelong Best Friends Know

15 Things Lifelong Best Friends Know
Image: Twenty20

15 Things Lifelong Best Friends Know
Twenty20

We love the friends we've made as an adult. They often share a lot of specific interests with us -- especially friends from grad school and from our work life -- and some of them are pretty sophisticated and have introduced us to ideas, books, and foods we may not have learned about otherwise. But the truth is, there's really nothing like our friends we've had since we were in grade school. At this point, there aren't too many left -- many of them we simply lost touch with over the years. With others, we kind of realized that others aren't necessarily the best fit in our lives anymore because they don't really make us feel great about ourselves (if this hits close to home, check out this article on toxic friendship). But the friends we still have from way back in the day? Pure gold. They've seen us at our best, at our worst, and everything in between -- and still love us. 


And the reverse is just as true. We love our oldest friends despite knowing their faults and flaws. And we love celebrating this kind of true, profound friendship! Even celebrities have friendships that have stood the test of time, which inspire us to do the work. The work of maintaining good, old friendships forever isn't always convenient, especially for besties who live in different states. It's also OK to acknowledge that our relationships with people we've known our whole lives are likely to change. For anyone struggling with the growing pains of a beautiful friendship that is in the middle of a metamorphosis, check out Friendship Takes on a Different Meaning as We Grow Older. It can really help us get through the struggles. And for those of who really do have the perfect BFF-ship, check out The Perfect Friendship: A Pie Chart Based on What's Actually Important -- and send it along to that bestie, STAT. Finally, we love this story: Women Reveal the Moments That Sealed Their Best Friendships Forever. It's a beautiful tribute to true friendships.

  • The Song That Will Always Get Us Dancing

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    The Song That Will Always Get Us Dancing
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    Few people out there know exactly how to get us to groove even if we're in the worst mood of all time -- and a lifelong BFF is the person who can pick just the right track for us, no matter what the problem is. 

  • Childhood Phone Numbers

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    Childhood Phone Numbers
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    Before cell phones, people had one phone number through which they’d reach every member of a single household. Remember asking someone’s mom or brother if a friend was around? Sometimes, chitchat was even necessary. I can still remember the phone number of every BFF who lived on my block when I was 7 -- even if we’re not Facebook friends now.

  • How We Lost Our Virginity

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    How We Lost Our Virginity
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    At a certain point in adulthood, the story of how we lost our virginity isn’t really a story worth telling anymore. But our friends from way back know every detail -- good, bad, and otherwise (and whether or not it was on prom night).

  • Our Parents

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    Our Parents
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    Sadly, adult friends don’t always swerve into the family zone because some of our parents have passed or they live far away. When we’re young, though, our family is us, we are our family, and friends get a front row seat to all those dynamics.

  • Our Awkward Phase

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    Our Awkward Phase
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    Even though we may have finally mastered the cowlick that used to torture us, finished with our braces, and overcome our acne, a true BFF will never forget how we used to look -- and yes, even the embarrassing clothes we used to wear. 

  • Our Buttons

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    Our Buttons
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    Speaking of, there are things that best friends know to never bring up. Or, conversely, just the thing to say to really get under our skin -- they know all of our biggest buttons (and may have even installed a few of them themselves). 

  • Our Flaws

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    Our Flaws
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    They’ve seen every emotional up and down we’ve endured, as we’ve endured them. When we’ve been petty, jealous, vindictive, lazy, or otherwise, she’s seen it -- and she still loves us. And that's really special. 

  • When to Just Shut Up & Listen

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    When To Just Shut Up And Listen
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    Old friends can tell, just from the tenor of our voice, that this is no moment to offer trite advice or platitudes. "Uh-huh. I hear you. That sucks." That’s all that's required -- no long-winded diatribes or turning the conversation to themselves. 

  • The Inside Joke That Will Always Make Us Laugh

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    The Inside Joke That Will Always Make Us Laugh
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    Every friendship has its own inane catchphrase that makes zero sense to other people. For example, if I were to yell out “ramming speed,” in a certain accent, I know exactly one person who would fall down in a fit of laughter.

  • Our Deepest, Darkest Secret

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    Our Deepest, Darkest Secret
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    Because we have to tell someone -- and there’s no one else in the world with a more trustworthy vault than our BFF. If we need them to give us advice about it, they will, but otherwise, they know we just need to talk. 

  • The Look

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    The Look
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    Yeah, that one. It's the look that says, "Seriously, what's going on here?" The one that speaks volumes without a single word. People who are really good friends can practically even hear the look over the phone.

  • All That Buried Dirt

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    All That Buried Dirt
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    A real bestie who's known us for ages will know exactly where all the figurative bodies are buried. When we snuck out late at night from our parents' place, when we skipped school, when we kissed that guy that summer our high school boyfriend was out of town... all of it. 

  • Our Very Favorite Food

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    Our Very Favorite Food
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    A real BFF will know what kind of snack to get when the worst happens: There's a breakup, a job loss, or whatever else. For some people, it's a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream, while for others, it may be Flamin' Hot Cheetos, but whatever it is, a true bestie knows it. 

  • Our Type

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    Our Type
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    A true bestie always knows how to spot someone we may be interested in from a mile away -- and also knows better than we do whether or not they're good for us. While our intuition may be good most of the time, our bestie's intuition is probably going to be better when it comes to our love lives. 

  • All Our Goals

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    All Our Goals
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    Someone we've been friends with since forever remembers when we wanted to grow up to be the world's first veterinarian-president-chef-horse trainer, the book we wanted to write... everything. Checking in about our old goals can be a great way to remind ourselves of what we still want to accomplish. 

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