Parenting

ER Doctor Mom Speaks Out After Losing Temporary Custody of Girl Due to Her Job

ParentingPublished Apr 13, 2020
By Kaitlin Stanford
Dr. Theresa GreeneCNN

Emergency room doctors and nurses are truly on the front lines of the pandemic, exposed to the deadly virus nearly every minute of their grueling work day. The risks this poses to their own health is not lost on the men and women who show up every day at the hospital, ready to try to save lives even if it means putting their own at risk by rewearing the same masks, gowns, and gloves they wore the day before. For those who have families, many of them may choose to self-isolate in another area of their home in between shifts or not to return home at all. But for others, such as Florida emergency room doctor Theresa Greene, it's not that simple. Greene, who has a 4-year-old daughter, is divorced -- and recently, she was blindsided when her ex filed for emergency sole custody and won.

The doctor told 6 South Florida that she tested negative for the virus, and continues to take all the necessary precautions at work and at home.

“When I come home, I take off my clothes outside, leave everything outside, it goes right in the washer, wash it on high, and I get in the shower,” she recently told People. “I actually am very paranoid and very careful -- like if I touch the doorknob I go back and I Lysol that.”

But according to her ex-husband, Eric Greene, that's simply not enough; especially considering how highly contagious the virus has proven itself to be.

For the last two years, Greene has shared joint custody with her ex, in a 50/50 agreement that gave them equal time with their daughter. But according to court documents, Eric filed for sole custody of the unnamed child “due to mother’s significantly heightened exposure to COVID-19,” the New York Post reported.

Last week, Judge Bernard Shapiro sided with the father, saying it was “in the best interests of the child” that she be in his care right now.

“In order to protect the best interests of the minor child, including but not limited to the minor child’s safety and welfare, this Court temporarily suspends the Former Wife’s timesharing until further Order of Court," the judge wrote in a court order. 

However, the decision is not forever, he noted, and is "solely related to the outbreak of COVID-19."

Her ex-husband's lawyer has said that the mom will be able to make up the days she's missing with her daughter once the crisis has passed.

But for Theresa Greene -- who, like many of us, has no idea when the outbreak will truly come to an end -- the decision was heartbreaking.

It also left her angry -- and prepared to fight back. Greene has since filed an appeal and is hoping the court reconsiders.

“How can you tell me because I’m divorced that I can’t come home -- obviously I have to shower -- but that I can’t come home and hug my daughter,” she told 6 South Florida last week.

Despite her own heartache, Greene is aware that her case is not actually unique right now.

“I know I’m not alone, first responders, nurses, so many people in this position who, because they’re divorced, their children are suffering and they're being told they can’t see them, and it’s just not fair,” the ER doctor shared.

But having to choose between her daughter and her patients has been emotionally grueling, she said.

"I think it's not fair, it's cruel to ask me to choose between my child and the oath I took as a physician," she told CNN's New Day. "I won't abandon my team at work or the patients who will increasingly look to me to save their lives in the coming weeks, but it's torture."

"I want [my daughter] when she grows up to be proud of me by abiding to the oath that I took when I went into medicine, but I also know that she needs me now," she continued. "If I was married I'd be given the opportunity to go home to my child, no one could tell me I shouldn't do that."

As of Monday, virus cases in Florida neared 20,000, with more than 460 deaths.

Nationwide, more than 557,500 confirmed cases exist, the Guardian reported, and the death toll has climbed to a staggering 22,114.

There's also been legitimate concern around how quickly the virus can spread at home, because countless cases of "family clusters" had made headlines -- including the heartbreaking tale of a family in New Jersey that had seven cases of COVID-19 and four deaths in a matter of days.

Although children amount to a very small percentage of the overall number of positive cases, experts theorize that children may not actually be "immune" to the virus -- they may just not be presenting symptoms. As silent carriers of the virus, that could contribute to its spread.

Still, Greene believes that the judge's ruling was ultimately short-sided.

“I was just shocked that the judge would take this stance without talking to medical experts and knowing the facts and take it so lightly, take my child from me and not think of the effect on her, her mental and psychological well-being,” she told the New York Post.

Greene also noted that the American Medical Association's position on this states that frontline physicians can go home to their families, so long as they take the proper precautions.

However, given that we're still learning more about the virus each day, many frontline workers just aren't willing to take that risk.

There were also reports in late March that first responders in New York City were sleeping in their cars to avoid going home to their families.

Greene maintained that she shouldn't have to make that choice between her profession and her child -- especially now, when spending time with her daughter is one of the few things getting her through this.

“I just fear that she’s going to think I abandoned her,” she told People. “And that’s really, really hard for me.”

On a FaceTime call last week, Greene recalled a particularly heartbreaking moment with her daughter that hasn't left her mind.

"She was playing with her animal friends and she told me her cat was mad at me," the doctor told People. "And I’ve seen her do that before, she uses transference like that, while she talks to her animals. I was like ‘oh, child, you’re breaking my heart.’”

No matter what happens, Greene says she'll continue to show up to work, ready to save lives however she can.

“You know I took an oath and I really believe in that, that’s why I went into medicine, to help people,” Greene told the Post.

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