8 Tips for Staying Close to Your Friends Even When You're a Mom

women laughingWith our busy lives, friendships often get neglected. It's tricky to find time for friends when juggling motherhood, marriage, and work. Some days we're barely able to squeeze in a shower or make dinner. Seeing your friends can be a challenge, but as I've learned, making time to hang out with friends is also making time for you and for your health. Friendships are nourishing for the soul -- we need them. But how do we fit them in? Here are some tips for how to keep your friends close even after you're a mom


"Friendships evolve if we are smart enough to learn our lessons, what works, what doesn’t," says life coach Jenny G. Perry, author of The Jennifers. She reminds us that connecting with our girlfriends is invigorating "because we are just us, not anyone’s wife, parent, or boss, just our sassy, spectacular, vibrant self, and we don’t have to worry about anything in that sacred sista time."

We all need that. I checked in with several moms who keep their friends close. These tips will help you do the same.

1. Send quick email messages. "With one of my best friends, Facebook private messaging is HUGE for us," Jeanne shared. "We try to write each other a line or two at least every day or every other day. We tend to only be able to get together with our kids, so we will do Mommy and Me playdates."

2. Make time, especially in times of need. "Besties with kids should totally meet for birthdays or if there is divorce, illness, or mid-life crisis," Jenny said. "If you just can’t or live far away, learn how to 'text love' each other. Send inspiring words or just even the funny emojis."

3. Visit whenever possible. "Lunch out! Or breakfast out," said Lori. "Any time that can be squeezed in with local friends, even if it's just for an hour. And random visits to those out of town."

4. Pick up the phone. Even if you hate talking on the phone, it's vital to stay connected. "We keep in touch by calling each other and not letting too much time go by," said Joann. Jenny added how just a phone call can really invigorate your soul and your friendship.

5. Don't get upset if time passes without connecting. "The friendships I have today are the ones that don't require work," Aimee shared. "I have one friend who I have been friends with since the seventh grade whom I talk to almost daily, but we understand that with kids, life gets busy. No reason to feel upset if we miss a call, it just flows."

6. Create a tradition. "For nearby friends, we hang out at happy hour, during our book club, and for Bunko games. For faraway friends, it's texting and email," said Allison.

7. Don't let a year go by without seeing each other. "I'm going on 30 years with my BFF and the last 20 we have lived in different states," Kelley said. "We don't talk every day or every month for that matter, but I know she is always there no matter what. We try and see each other at least once a year. We really don't have to try -- we just are, I guess."

8. Skype. "I have a lot of incredible girlfriends, and Facebook has been great to keep us connected, but I really try to make phone calls, and there are always text messages sent with love just to check in. I even Skype with some friends who are abroad," shared Jennifer.

Now what are you waiting for? Reconnect with your friends. All you need to do is start with a quick text.

How do you stay connected with your friends?

Image via Robert Bejil/Flickr

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