Women have complicated relationships with each other. Any girl who has gone through middle school knows this. One day, someone is your best friend. The next, you are persona non grata. Problem is, it's now happening to more and more grownups too. It hurts no matter how old we are, noted Sarah Jessica Parker in a new interview with British Harper's Bazaar. According to the Sex and the City star, women are more cruel to each other now than ever. And she's right. So when did this mean girl behavior become the rule rather than the exception?
Gone are the days when we see supportive female relationships like that of Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha. Sure, they got angry, annoyed, or disappointed with each other, but they were never hateful or spiteful. That kind of bond almost seems like a fairytale these days. Sarah Jessica blames reality TV, where women are always unfriendly to each other. We are more likely to see women curse out and throw things at each other than hug. It's like we have moved into a culture of "bring the bitch down" rather than lift one another up.
Certainly bullying and teasing among women is not new. It's gone on for generations. Even my 80-year-old grandmother can recall some girl at the school house being ostracized for no good reason at all. But it's just so incredibly vicious these days. And it doesn't end with grade school for any of us. Grownup mean girls are just as much of an epidemic. And they can have just as devastating emotional effects as they did when we were young. It's hard to deal with feelings of being bullied and picked on as an adult. It can even be emotionally crippling. As a child, you may find solace in the fact that once you are an adult, you won't have to deal with the nastiness and bitchiness. But what do you do when it happens in the work place, your neighborhood, or among the parents at your child's school? There is nowhere to run.
I wish I had a solution. But some people will always derive some sick, sadistic pleasure from the torment of others. So I'm not expecting some Kumbaya moment. However, those of us disgusted by this behavior need to support one another, extend our hand in friendship, and stand up for someone when we see it happening. Most women are wonderful, loyal friends. Let's turn that back into the rule and put the grownup mean girls in their place.
Have you ever dealt with adult mean girls? How did you handle it?
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