Moms Need to Stop Focusing So Much on the Future

Focus on the pixel, not the big pictureI've always been a big picture thinker, which can be handy in a few instances. But mostly, it makes you focus on the destination and miss the entire journey.

Worse, when you finally think you've reached the destination, it's not at all how you imagined it.

If you're like me and tend to think about tomorrow and the next day rather than enjoying today, you need to read this, stat.


Now I can't take credit for this huge revelation. My dear friend Asha (founder of Parent Hacks) shared this post on her Facebook page, and ever since I read it, I just can't stop thinking about it.

I grew up with a pretty difficult family life, and to escape the madness, I spent most of my time daydreaming. I thought about everything from realistic choices I'd make when I was old enough to fantastical scenarios that admittedly included a bit of revenge, mostly of the "Look at me now don't you wish you loved me" variety.

Back then, those daydreams saved me. They gave me hope and the belief that things in my life could be different.

But I admit to becoming pretty dependent on them. And quite frankly, in many situations, I still am.

I play out exactly how I wish things could be, which can be a pretty dangerous road to travel down.

So when I read the post that Asha shared, I experienced a pretty significant shift in my focus. Because when you think about life as a picture, as in YOUR WHOLE LIFE, and each singular day as a pixel, you learn to be more grateful. You learn to focus on what you can actually experience.

And more importantly, what you can actually change. Right here, right now.

To be clear, this has nothing to do with the whole "living like there's no tomorrow" mantra that I know a lot of people have because, to be honest, I don't think that's so realistic.

But when you think about your day as one singular "moment" in a collection of "moments" that are your life, you see the awesome and the awful without any preconceived ideas or ideals.

There is something wonderful and satisfying about enjoying the right here right now.

And better, you let your own future and your own kids' future play out without disappointment or overwhelm.

Because as I've learned, life has a way of surprising us. Sometimes in not so great ways. Sometimes in wonderful ways that are far beyond your imagination.

So ask yourself what you can do today. What you can enjoy and appreciate today. What you can change or make better today.

And don't waste your energy on tomorrow until you actually get there.

What's your favorite life mantra?


Image via Jennifer/Flickr

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