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People Stuck Some Shockingly Crazy Things in Their Bodies This Year

by Jacqueline Burt on December 27, 2012 at 8:00 AM

forkOkay, if Deadspin's annual list of most "interesting" objects inserted in body orifices is any indication, certain people need to make some serious New Year's Resolutions. I am NOT joking. The list is no joke, either -- this disturbing info is extracted from a "searchable database of emergency visits."

Oh my, oh my oh my oh my. What are people thinking?! I mean, it's one thing for a 3-year-old to accidentally get a Barbie shoe stuck up her nose. But why would any reasonable adult even consider sticking THAT thing up THERE? "Well doctor, you see, I just happened to be ... well, there's a perfectly logical explanation as to how I got this toy microphone stand stuck in my ... "

Seriously. Prepare to be shocked, horrified, and fascinated all at the same time ...

Here are just a few of the crazy, random things people stuck in very inapproprate parts of their body this year, organized by body part:

Ear:

PLASTIC DART
PIECE OF PAPER
"TOOTHPICK AND THEN HAIRPIN"
WOOD
SCREWDRIVER
PLASTIC DRINKING STRAW

Nose:

CRUCIFIX
BATTERY
TOY DIAMOND
"A PENNY OR POPCORN IN NOSE, SEEMS BOTHERED"

Throat:

LEMON SEED
MAXI PAD
CHECKER
THIMBLE
THUMBTACK
BUTTERFLY

Penis:

SPOON
PLASTIC ZIP TIE
FORKS
ORNAMENT
"PIECE OF TIMBER"

Vagina:

TOY MICROPHONE STAND
SEWING NEEDLES
"PATIENT STATES SHE SLIPPED & FELL ONTO A TOY TRUCK WHILE CLEANING"
HAIRSPRAY CAP
TUB STOPPER

Rectum:

FRENCH BREAD
VIAL OF BATH SALTS
ARTIFICIAL CHRISTMAS TREE BRANCH
DRUM STICK
VINEGAR BOTTLE
BABY BOTTLE
"LOOFA W/SUCTION CUP W/HOOK ATTACHED"

Let me guess: You're feeling shocked, horrified and fascinated all at the same time, aren't you? An artificial Christmas tree branch?! A piece of timber?! HOW? WHY?

Or maybe this list made you cringe with recognition. 'Fess up:

What's the weirdest thing you've ever gotten stuck in a body part?


Image via viZZZual.com/Flickr

Filed Under: general health

Comments

32
  • worki...
    --

    workingmama86

    December 27, 2012 at 8:38 AM

    This can't be real. lol. Some of that stuff sounds impossible to get stuck... 


  • Mom2f...
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    Mom2fourlove

    December 27, 2012 at 9:13 AM
    Ya and its pretty disturbing that children and baby things are in people's vaginas and rectums...
  • adiggs87
    --

    adiggs87

    December 27, 2012 at 9:31 AM

    when my hubby was a kid, he got a pea stuck up his nose! it was left there for a week untill his parents noticed a smell! gross... how do you not notice something like that? anyways, I agree with the ladies above, some of this list seems impossible! and I too find it pretty disturbing people are using children's toys and bottles for what this article says they are being used for!!!!

     

     

     

     


  • Carly
    -- Nonmember comment from

    Carly

    December 27, 2012 at 10:17 AM
    A fucilli Jerry, perhaps?
    Also, the little boy I babysit once dropped a pony bead (the large plastic ones) in his ear. When they pulled it out a week later, it was black. When they asked him why he did it, he said "I wanted to see if it would fit. Also, it was pink when I put it in there."
  • Mommi...
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    MommietoJB

    December 27, 2012 at 11:53 AM
    My son stuck a very small cotton ball that was used on his classroom art project up his nose at school. After a week my son was so stinky. I didnt know why, he did have a cold, so I decided to look up his nose. The ball had turned green from the fungus.
  • Blues...
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    Blueshark77

    December 27, 2012 at 1:16 PM

    My partner and one of our friends work in hospitals and it is amazing what people will put in their bodies. I'm not talking about little kids, but grown-ups putting crazy things in their rectums. They always say they fell on it. Sure.....


  • MomOf...
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    MomOf2AndAZoo

    December 27, 2012 at 2:07 PM

    A friend of mine has an aunt who is a nurse, and she told me about some crazy stuff her aunt has seen come in to the emergency room. She said one time they had a woman come in with a mason jar stuck in her vagina! Insane....


  • weird...
    --

    weirdkids

    December 27, 2012 at 2:19 PM

    to all those saying impossible.... my dad worked in an er.... you would be horrified at what people pulled out of their orfaces. personally, it was a matchbox car wheel up the nose when i was 4. my mom and grandmother were laughing so hard that they couldnt tell the dr what was wrong. dr pushed it up further by accident and they were prepping me for surgery when i sneezed and it shot out.


  • shami...
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    shamillionaire

    December 27, 2012 at 2:20 PM
    Wtf so sick!
  • shami...
    --

    shamillionaire

    December 27, 2012 at 2:20 PM
    Wtf so sick!
1-10 of 32 comments

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