Smoking Pot for PMS Could Totally Backfire

medical marijuanaRemember the Blair Witch Project? Well, star and filmmaker Heather Donahue is back with a slightly less scary stunt: A memoir about her year growing marijuana titled Grow Girl. Apparently the acting thing didn't work out -- plus that darn PMS kept turning her into a witch month after month. And that's how Heather hooked up with her medical marijuana license to treat her PMS and embarked on the grassy adventure of a lifetime.

Smoke Pot for PMS?!? At first glance that sounds like an EXCELLENT solution. Yes, we should definitely look into that. Sign me up for that medical study! But when I really think it through (while sober), I have to admit that maybe it's not for me.

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Supposedly, pot is one of the few substances that can take on all the delightful array of PMS ailments: discomfort, bloating, cramps, backache and headaches, irrational desire to hatchet every human in sight. People swear by it, tea heads. I'm all for trying alternative medicine. And I totes believe you tokers, truly.

I'm just saying -- taking pot for PMS is so not going to help me in the long run. Why? Because no matter what's going on with my lady parts, I still have to show up for work every day and continue caring for my son like the semi-responsible parent I am. I cannot afford to just take a few days off watching Gilligan's Island re-runs and giggling to myself. I can't.

Oh -- you don't think it has to be that way? I've heard it before: "I'm a responsible professional! I'm 100 percent functional even while high!" Sure ... good for you, Miley. 'Tis not the case for me. Maybe you think these posts would sound exactly the same if I wrote them baked. And maybe you're right. (Don't think I haven't considered it.) BUT THEY WOULD TAKE ME TWICE AS LONG TO WRITE. And I would probably snack twice as much while writing.

Here's the thing: I can solve the same PMS problems with some calcium magnesium supplements and exercise. (Ask your doctor before trying it yourself.) They're legal, and they don't send me off to Planet Good Times, the Land Where Adriana Gets Lost. So thanks, really, but no. Please don't pass the dutchie on the left-hand side when it's that time of the month.

Have you ever used medical marijuana instead of traditional medicine? Do you think it should be legalized?

 

Image via Goodnight London

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