buttI collect plastic surgery horror stories the way some people collect precious porcelain figurines. The latest? The saga of a botched butt boost involving an exotic dancer from Baltimore. The dancer, who has not been named in reports, was hospitalized for shortness of breath after undergoing a shady procedure in which silicone was injected into her buttocks: The implant affected her lungs and resulted in pneumonia. The shoddy buttocks enhancement, which was allegedly conducted in a local hotel room by another woman who has been arrested, is only the most recent a series of stories highlighting the dangers of a disturbing (and sometimes deadly!) trend.

Listen, even plastic surgery conducted by a medically certified professional in a "safe" environment carries risks. And while I can absolutely understand that, for many people, the perceived benefits of a nose job or a boob reduction or a host of other procedures conducted by a reputable plastic surgeon outweigh the risks, I kind of draw the line at butt boosts, which ABC News reports are dramatically on the rise -- let alone butt boosts not done by a certified plastic surgeon.

Honestly, is a bigger butt really worth risking your life for? I can't imagine it is! Ladies, if you're embarrassed by your diminutive caboose, perhaps you should just stop looking at it. It's not like it confronts you every time you glance in the mirror to brush your teeth or anything. And if you're worried that people are judging you for having bony hindquarters, well, perhaps you should ask yourself if that isn't really their problem, and not yours.

But if you find yourself hankering for perkier glutes, you really might remind yourself of the risks involved. Because -- bottom line -- though no way to die is good, death by booty boost might just the most mortifying of all.

Do you consider buttocks enhancement a procedure that's worth the risk?

 

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