To me, one of the most annoying, distressing activities ever is overhearing women talking to one another about either food or clothes. More often than not, either in retail store fitting rooms or restaurants, I'm hard-pressed to avoid hearing a woman lamenting how "fat" she is, how she should just stop eating altogether, or how she wishes she could stuff her face with Krispie Kremes and Cold Stone and never gain a pound. Well, ladies, here's proof that last wish isn't as awesome as it sounds.
A woman named Carole French can do just that -- eat whatever she wants (and she does!), but she can't gain weight. She is one of only TWO people on the whole planet (well, who we know of) who has been diagnosed with muscular fibrositis disproportion, a disorder that prevents her body from storing fat. Sounds like many women's dream come true, but it's nothing short of a nightmare for French.
Although people tell her she's "lucky to be so thin," she's treated like a freak show. She says, "People can be really cruel. I know I look different, but I don't choose to look the way I do."
My heart goes out to French, and we should be paying attention to her story.
She's living proof you can't judge someone on their appearance, whether they're super-slim, overweight, or seemingly "perfect." Although, yes, I'm certainly guilty of it. We all are. I know I've looked at a woman and immediately jumped to the conclusion that she's got some kind of eating disorder. And I've rolled my eyes upon hearing a woman whine that she just can't put on weight no matter what she does. It's pretty difficult not to think -- at least for a split second -- "You b*tch, most women only WISH they could have your problem!"
But then I remind myself she might be hyperthyroid (aka having a crazy-fast metabolism, but lots of other nasty symptoms to boot), or suffering from some other disease, much like Carole French. A stranger I saw yesterday who looked painfully thin turned out to have some kind of serious digestive issue or Lyme disease. Eesh!
There are MANY instances when a woman's weight is simply out of her hands. And the bottom line is that it's usually no one's place to judge her or tell her how to manage her own health. (Chicago woman who approached LeAnn Rimes and told her to "eat something" last weekend, I'm looking at you!) It's not just crappy but crazy for us to assume we know what a stranger's personal health challenges are, thinking less or more of them as a result.
What do you think about this woman's struggle?
Image via irina slutsky/Flickr
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Comments (21)
I'm one of those people that can't seem to gain weight . Iv'e weighed a steady 90 at 5"1 for the past three years . I eat very well and try very hard to gain healthy weight, but it's quite difficult . Probably just as difficult as losing weight . It's upsetting when people make comments about my weight, or tell me that real women have curves, etc . Just as people shouldn't be quick to judge overweight people, they shouldn't be quick to judge skinny women, too .
Agreed with babybirch. And goodness forbid a skinny woman get pregnant and not start showing until 8 months or so. I get told constantly by people to "eat something every now and then" and that I'm too small and all sorts of things. I eat CONSTANTLY. My doctor says I'm healthy and baby is healthy.
It's incredibly tacky and rude to comment on anyone's weight, period. Let's keep potential hurtful comments to ourselves. Even if they don't sound hurtful to you, hearing things like, "You're so small!" and "We need to fatten you up" starts to hurt and affect the self esteem after the 500th person says it.
My mother-in-law is the same way. Been rail-thin her entire life. She has a naturally fast metabolism, and discovered thyroid issues later on. And y'know what? She has body insecurities just like any woman, even though I think she looks like a retired model! She hates her bony shoulders and "chicken legs". If she loses weight because of a medication adjustment, it can take up to a year for her to put 5 pounds back on. She hates it.
So being that "naturally skinny" is not all it's cracked up to be.
im told all the time to eat something or im to skiny! but i eat all the time! i eat junk food and healthy food! i can never gain weight! when i was pregnant i gained 60 pounds and lost all the weight in 3 months! its awful! i dont know the secret or how i do it its just how life it!
Being thin is not looked down upon. Being fat is. So it's easy for overweight women, or anyone really, to be jealous of women who can't gain weight. In their brains it's like "you're complaining because you can't gain weight, seriously?", when that person would give anything to be able to lose a few pounds. But they don't understand that it's not always necessarily healthy or even desirable to not be able to gain weight, just like it's unhealthy to not be able to lose weight. It's not a condition people choose to have. I don't judge people by the way they look. I don't assume very thin women should "eat something". I don't assume overweight women should "get off their couches and do something". I only worry about my own body and wish every woman well on her journey to being comfortable with hers and a high-five to the women who already are.
The best friend that I ever had was terribly thin...like 80 lbs. at 5'6". The problem was due to health issues. She died at 38.
I've always been fat, and I'm 54 now...and fairly halthy except for chronic pain issues. NO ONE should want to be that thin.
i have had trouble gaining weight for as long as i can remember...i don't think i've ever been above the 5th-10th percentile.....it doesn't bother me so much these days as it did when i was a teen and couldn't fit into any of the clothes my friends did. people can be abrasive and rude about it at times, mostly women trying to insinuate that i have an eating disorder (cause thats the only way to be thin right??) you get good at blocking out the negative after awhile just as im sure many women on the heavier side do! but i'm going to agree with some previous posts, it is a thin obsessed culture so i feel that it is easier to err on the side of being too thin than the opposite....its sad really. why can't we just be ourselves?!!