In our fat-fighting, health-conscious society, no one likes to admit it, but it's true: Some people are better off fat. We like some of our celebs like Khloe Kardashian and Drew Carey with some extra chub on them, but grudgingly accept they should lose it for their health. But when it comes to this guy, it's not his health he's affecting by losing weight, it's mine -- his diet is sending my blood pressure through the roof.
He's none other than Mr. Potato Head, and Hasbro has put him on a diet, or given him liposuction, or something to make him into a svelter spud. Who wants a skinny potato? No one! I'm blaming Dr. Atkins -- may he rest in peace -- and all the other carb bashers out there for this one.
The new Mr. Potato Head and his tinier tater of a wife, Mrs. Potato Head, were unveiled recently at the International Toy Fair convention in New York. They will hit toy shelves this fall, and between now and then, it's time to hit every yard sale and eBay auction to hoard the fatter fellows.
Besides being ridiculous, what's the purpose anyway? Do they really think anyone ever looked to Mr. Potato Head as a fitness role model? I think they may be a little too high on the role of the guy. He's fun to stick things in and all, but I've never compared my ass to his. Now Barbie's is another story ...
My body issues aside, it's a toy well-designed for toddlers -- his chubby body is just perfect for tiny little fingers ... or was. First Cookie Monster had to get all healthy, and now Mr. Potato Head. Is there no scared ground left untrampled by this vicious fight against fat? My children need to know that when it comes to some things, bigger is better. How will they ever shop well for produce with such a warped experience?
Potatoes are picked for their plumpness, not because we want to look like them, and toys are picked because they're fun. The new potato heads are not fun; they're a fanatical example of our obsession with blaming media images, and now toys, for affecting people's health. Let's focus instead on our personal responsibility for what we shove in our mouths instead of starving unsuspecting, innocent spuds who should be left to their couch-loving ways. Barney beware, they're likely to come after you next.
What do you think of a skinnier Mr. Potato Head?
Image via Sam Howzit/Flickr