Charlie Sheen Rehab Choice Screams FAIL to Me

Charlie Sheen is too cool for The Betty Ford Clinic, Passages, Promises, or any other place where celebrities congregate to overcome their never-ending issues with drugs and booze. Instead, the 45-year-old is goin' to rehab ... at home.

Call me crazy, but I'm not quite seeing how that will work. Will Charlie get to chill on his leather couch while his iPhone is confiscated so he can't text his coke dealer? Security guards will stand guard at every gate on the property, fending off hookers and porn stars?

Oh, no, supposedly it just means he's going to "receive visits from an addiction expert," according to TMZ.


Proponents of the treatment say a pro is that the patient gets to feel "at home" while battling his or her addiction demons.

How is that a good thing? I see rehab as a detox or cleansing experience. A bare, restful environment that removes you from the surroundings that have contributed to your issues. But Charlie's pad is anything but. It's where he has likely thrown many a party, featuring many mountains of white stuff on marble countertops and countless bottles of alcohol. Plus, he will likely have access to his phone, iPad, laptop, etc., which means he'll be in touch with people who contribute to his addiction.

Experts say one possibly reasonable argument for him obtaining treatment at home is that he'll be sheltered from paparazzi that could potentially throw him off-course. But, what the hell? That, to me, is like trying to lose weight by having only Slim-Fast shakes or eating bite-sized pre-packaged NutriSystem meals. Eventually you have to go out into the real world, and it's sink or swim. You gotta learn how to deal with your food/drug/booze issues in everyday life. And sorry, Charlie -- because your screw-ups are such great fodder for tabloid news, your everyday life just happens to involve flashing cameras galore.

Furthermore, group counseling is a really important part of rehab. Is Charlie going to Skype an AA meeting? Or will his living room "addiction expert" role-play other addicts? 

Seems to me Charlie's taking the easiest way out of really facing his problem. Rumor has it his parents may be considering filing for conservatorship (like Britney Spears's father had). Sure, he's 45 years old, but maybe if his finances are in his parents' hands, Charlie will finally feel compelled to clean up his act.

Do you think in-home rehab could work?

Image via Jackson Lee/Splash News

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