I've found a new man crush, and his name is Arthur from Portland, Oregon. He doesn't know who I am, yet. But I may possibly be one of his biggest fans after the premiere of season 11 of The Biggest Loser: Couples last night on NBC.
The new season, which follows 11 new couples, has a lengthy list of grade A contestants. But Arthur, a standout being the heaviest contestant ever featured on the show at 507 pounds and a father of two, has come a long way just to get to the ranch.
"I'm as big around as I am tall, actually I'm bigger," he said.
I just wanna hug all 507 pounds of you. Well, 476 pounds after last night's weigh-in. He had me tearing up within the first 10 minutes.
"I just got to do something, I'm living on borrowed time."
Yup, I'm a 20-something baby. And the tears didn't stop there. Here come the weigh-ins.
Team after team gets up onto the scale, and after reality sets in and the weights are posted for all of America to see -- there's sob story after sob story. The hardest of them all: the parent and child teams where the parents take responsibility for their kid's weight problems.
“This is the average American family," trainer Bob Harper said. "These mothers and daughters and fathers and sons keep coming into our house, and it's like, is no one listening? The families have to pull together, and work together ... If you don’t I’ll be seeing you season 13, 14, or 15.”
Denise and Sarah, a mother-daughter team from the Utah/Las Vegas area, make me full-on burst into hysterics. Her mom starts crying because she feels like this is her fault, and then Sarah loses it and says she's lost multiple pregnancies because of her extra pounds. I actually get up to get a tissue here.
If that's not enough -- the black team consisting of two police officer brothers will surely do the trick. Don's son has abandoned him and cut off communication. Why? Because he's fat.
WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!? Can't you see your father is miserable!? That's like walking away when you see he's an alcoholic, and then shoving a drink in his face.
Around an hour into the show, we find out about the two new trainers (which Biggest Loser followers found out about during last season's finale). The contestants learn that if they chose to work with these other trainers (we have no idea who they are), they earn four weeks immunity.
And naturally, they make the contestants struggle through a 5k to see who gets first choice of trainers, and one by one the teams choose between Jillian Michaels and Bob, and "the unknowns" (way too dramatized for me).
While we didn't see faces of these new trainers throughout the 2-hour program, we do see their backsides. OH! And we find out that the girl is a boxer and the man is one of the "best trainers in America." Wow. So detailed.
Meanwhile, we watch the six couples training with Bob and Jillian sweat through an intense workout, where one team member faints and Arthur falls hard after getting off the treadmill. (No! My love!)
And as the end-of-show weigh-ins occur, we see absolutely nothing from the five couples who have chosen the four weeks immunity and "the unknowns." I do experience a mild heart palpitation when Arthur (who loses 31 pounds, yeah baby!) and his dad almost get sent home. It's not until the final couple, the orange team, weighs in that we find out my crush and his father are safe.
Thank GOD, I think to myself. He needs this.
Was it the most interesting two hours of TV I've ever watched? No. But man if you need a good cry (or eight), this season of The Biggest Loser is sure to satisfy your tear ducts.
Will you be tuning in to season 11 of The Biggest Loser? Do you have a favorite team?
Image via NBC