8 Great Reasons to Use Your Phone During Sex (PHOTOS)

Adriana Velez | Aug 7, 2013 Good News

bedsheetsPeople use their phones in the weirdest places. A new survey asked Americans where and when we're pulling out our iPhones and Androids, and the responses almost make me want to ditch modern life and hole up in a cabin in the mountains somewhere. (Except you know I wouldn't get good service up there and would have to come back.)

We use our phones everywhere. Over half of us use the phone while driving -- still! Thirty-five percent of us will whip out a phone in the movie theater. Nineteen percent of people use the phone in church -- why, to phone God??? Thirty-two percent of us use a phone during our kids' school functions (which is actually quite understandable). Twelve percent of us use the phone while in the shower. And get this: Nine percent of you are pulling out the damn phone during sex. SEX! Why, people? Why?

Actually, now that I think of it, there are a number of reasons why you might want to pull out a phone while you're having sex -- well, specifically a smartphone. Here's a few I thought of off the top of my head.

 

  • Look Up Fun New Positions

    1

    So you two are at it again in the usual missionary position, and suddenly you think: Wouldn't it be fun to try something a little more adventurous? But what? Obviously it would be better if this flash of inspiration had hit you at a more convenient time. But a whole world of positions is just a Google away.

  • Take Pictures

    2

    marya/Flickr

    I'm just saying. You're having fun, and maybe you like how your partner looks naked, and maybe you want to capture that. Just don't let your kids play with your phone after ...

  • Make a Movie

    3

    Photos are just the gateway drug to the real fun: Video, mwa ha ha! Except you'd probably need a tripod for your phone, now that I think of it, because aren't your hands busy, and ... hmm, the logistics of this sound complicated. Has anyone actually tried making a sex video with your phone, and would you like to offer some tips? I'm asking for a friend.

  • Multitask

    4

    Wonderlane/Flickr

    The previous ideas are all assuming you have a rockin' -- or potentially rockin' -- sex life. But maybe it's just okay. Maybe, while your husband huffs and puffs above you for the 50 bajillionth time, you'd like to add a few items to your grocery list and check off a few to-do items (screw dh, check), and bid on that Alexander Wang dress you saw on eBay.

  • Call Your Therapist

    5

    Oof, maybe the sex is so bad you need to phone in a session while it's still happening.

  • Sex Needs a Soundtrack

    6

    Because maybe you don't have an iPod -- maybe you have your Sexytimes Playlist on your iPhone instead.

  • Schedule a Doctor's Appointment

    7

    Justin Brockie/Flickr<

    You've been meaning to schedule that annual pap smear, but you just keep forgetting -- except when he's down there. Then you remember that you have a vagina, and that its health needs to be monitored by a professional. Quick, make that appointment now while you still remember. Then, of course, you'll have to add it to the calendar on your phone. (Just another minute, honey, I swear. Keep going, you're doing great. I'm almost there ...)

  • The World Needs to Know

    8

    Maybe he just did something SO AMAZING you have to Tweet it or Facebook it immediately before your easily-distracted little brain forgets. Congratulations, you have gone beyond oversharing and into some strange new land that makes the rest of us reeeally uncomfortable.

sex slideshow apps cameras cell phone social media

More Slideshows