Kentucky Derby: Which Horse Wins for Best Name?

kentucky derbyAh, the Kentucky Derby: Mint Julips, cool fashion (fancy hats!), a celebrity crowd and ... oh, right, a horse race that's also known as "The Greatest Two Minutes in Sports." This year's 4-legged contenders include Daddy Nose Best, I'll Have Another, and Rousing Sermon, Daddy Long Legs, and Done Talking.

Those are some cute, creative names right? And the names of the horses are no laughing matter (or maybe they are, but we'll get to that later) -- some people actually place their bets based on their favorite names.


In that spirit, various funny, creative types have been brainstorming possible horse names for future Kentucky Derby races and they've come up with some doozies.

ESPN asked its Twitter followers, "If you owned a Kentucky Derby horse, what would you name it?" And got these in response:

Kim KarDASHian

You are the Father

Edward Lizardhands

Runs With Beer

The Gelded Age

Why the Long Face

Michael Boltin'

Hung Jury

Over at Bleacher Report, columnist Gabe Zaldivar came up with these should-have-been Kentucky Derby horse names (among others), which are accompanied by photos that you've got to see (check out "Horse"):

Cool Story Bro

Tickle Me Elmo

My Other Horse is an Ass

Jessica Simpson Hell Spawn

Lilo's Toothbrush

Kimye (Get it? Kim K & Kanye --the new Brangelina!)

NPR asked readers to submit hypothetical horse names (they had to follow a bunch of rules) and here were some of the responses:

Whatever Yourself

No Guarantee

Hunga Dunga Dang

Jimmy Hoofa

Don't Have a Cow


And here are a few mom-themed funnies we'd like to throw into the mix:

Mama Nose Best (I mean c'mon!)

Bodacious Breeder

Bridle Sweet

The Buck Stops Here

Co-Sleeper's Dream

Helicopter Mare

Not Tonight Honey

Dirty Diaper

Rockin' Horse

Vax to the Max

Wear Your Hat

Tiger Horse


Breast Is Best

Free Range Trotter

Tanning Without My 5-Year-Old

Which names are your favorite? What would you name a Kentucky Derby Horse?


Image via southerntabitha/Flickr

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