Let me just start by saying I like Chipotle. I really, really like them. When it comes to premium Mexican-American fast food, I think they're the tops. And they're really trying to be the "good guys" of the fast food world. I love that. But is a Chipotle burrito like an iPhone? Come on, now. That's just crazy talk.

But somebody went there.

Last week in Slate, Matthew Yglesias compared Chipotle to Apple. Apple as in the company, not the food. He said, "In many ways, the Chipotle burrito is very similar to the iPhone." Look, I know iPhones. I use one every day. But the Chipotle burrito is no iPhone.

From Adele to Jennifer Hudson's tribute to Whitney Houston, the 2012 Grammys were packed with plenty of wow-inducing moments. There was one star, however, that no one expected to shine quite as brightly as it did -- Chipotle.

Yes, that's right; the Tex-Mex chain was the breakout performer of the night with a commercial that got rave reviews. Set to the music of Willie Nelson who covers Coldplay's "The Scientist," the two-minute animated commercial was a powerful statement not about how wonderful its burritos are, but about the ethics behind their food and the importance of sustainable farming. It put Coldplay's live performance to shame. If you missed it, check it out after the jump.

There's nothing quite as American as fast food -- quick and easily accessible calorie-laden meals served with a giant bucket of soda to wash it all down. But a new survey of customers' top fast food restaurants revealed something surprising about our fast food preferences: Americans' favorite restaurants are decidedly un-American! See for yourself ...

You know those signs you see at any store, dining establishment, or anywhere there are things being sold: "We Reserve the Right to Refuse Service to Anyone"? Like, say, this one? While this may be only a sign that gets ignored in many locales, one restaurant owner is taking his right to refuse service very seriously. A Beijing man has decided he will refuse to serve anyone who brings his mistress in to dine at his fine establishment (note: he says "mistress" not "boy toy"), and especially those who use "public money" to pay for their good time.

Bravo, sir. Bravo. If only more people would put their morals before money, and refuse service to those they disagree with on a regular basis. Oh, wait, that totally happens. And it's not such an awesome thing.

There's an art to ordering a good bottle of wine on a romantic date, and let me assure you that it certainly doesn't involve panic in the streets, hand sweats, fumbling through the list, and acting like you learned how to read only yesterday. Sure, wine can be intimidating, but that doesn't mean you should let it make a mockery out of you, especially in front of your date. And with Valentine's Day just around the corner it's time you learned to order like a pro. So, relax, open that wine list with poise and confidence, and let Gwendolyn Osborn from Wine.com show you how it's done:

What in the Mac is this world coming to? Can't we all just behave ourselves at the drive-through? According to witnesses, Evangeline Marrero Lucca of North Carolina cut into the line at her local McDonald's drive-through. She bypassed the order window and the pay window, pulling up right at the pick-up window. LIKE YOU CAN JUST DO THAT. And then she refused to budge until someone took and delivered her order. Which means she stayed there for 20 minutes.

What happened next is what always seems to happen when you have people behaving badly in public these days: Police stunned her with a taser. Did the police go too far? Well, shucks, maybe? But I don't think you're going to find much outrage on Evangeline's behalf.

Oh Shamrock Shake, how I adore thee. Seeing your minty green color back at McDonald's makes me all giddy. Your peppermint taste makes my heart beat with a passionate fury. I appreciate your McCafe goodness so much more than the M&M's McFlurry.

At last you've been spotted at stores nationwide. In honor of St. Patrick's Day, you make your big 2012 debut and we excitedly buy! A cult following you've found (they even have their own website!). It's crazy to think such an inexpensive thing (only about $2.29 for a small) brings so much delight!

I don't know if it's possible to find something wrong with you, my friend. Your perfect mixture of vanilla and mint is so enjoyable, can I get an AMEN!? Though, there is one little thing that gives me the worries. I'll give you a hint -- it has EVERYTHING to do with your high amount of calories.

More Risky Than a Dog Attack?Fascinating news from McDonald's, as the burger empire takes down an ad for their new Chicken McBites because they offended pit bull owners. So a movie about how your food is processed doesn't give you pause, but a bunch of whiny pit bull owners complaining about an ad that said "petting a stray pit bull" was risky will? (Note to whiners: A stray pit bull doesn't even HAVE an owner, by definition.)

Perhaps McDonald's should have asked me first about the wrath of this small but vocal group. They are an aggressive crowd and have been known to bite for lesser reasons. Of course, it's not so much the tendency to bite, but the way that they just hold on, like a steel trap, that causes the real damage. Clearly, you didn't enjoy being mauled by pit bull owners and have caved under the attack. That's a wimpy thing to do, but those pit bull folks had a point. Is petting a stray pit bull less dangerous than eating at McDonald's? Let's take a look at the menu.