Rumor has it that as much as they've enjoyed teasing their women for reading E.L. James' erotic series, men have been craving their own version of Fifty Shades of Grey. Well, bacon aficionado Ben Myhre recently decided one way to fill that void was by offering meat-lovin' guys -- and gals -- a cookbook featuring fifty shades of ... cured pig meat. Yep, bringing BDSM to breakfast, Fifty Shades of Bacon actually exists. So, hey, if for some reason, Fifty Shades of Chicken wasn't for you, maybe this tome will be!

The takeoff on the insanely popular trilogy features chapter titles like "Foreplay" (appetizers, obvs), "Afternoon Delight" (main course), and "Multiple Orgasms" (dessert). Uh-huh -- bacon-flavored desserts!

Some of the food (included in the book) for thought ...

So you got stuck making the turkey this Thanksgiving huh? I don't know about you, but the threat of having to make the bird always makes me think of that awful dried out carcass from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Remember how it just cracked open, and everyone stared? Don't let that be you! A juicy turkey is easier than you think. And you don't have to trust me (why would you; I'm a vegetarian!). I always turn to the pros when I'm on holiday dinner duty. Here's what the experts have to say about keeping the bird nice and moist!

Well look who's hitching a ride on the Fifty Shades pornwagon, trying to change her reputation: KALE. You know, the dark leafy green vegetable? Oh yeah, she's hot like Anastasia, and she's got a new e-cookbook: 50 Shades of Kale.

This is me biting my lip! Dr. Drew Ramsey (The Happiness Diet) and Jennifer Iserloh (Secrets of a Skinny Chef) have brought kale into the bedroom -- or something like that. Those crayzee kids! What will they think of next? My inner green goddess salad is palpitating at the possibilities. So how HAWT is this cookbook?

Stars, they're just like us only better looking with better bodies and more charming and superhuman forget it they're not just like us -- right? Pretty much. All we ever hear about are the iron-lady workouts and the incredible inedible diets. Except when someone spills some real dirt on what stars are actually eating.

Introducing Kate McAloon, chef to celebs like Gwyneth Paltrow, Miranda Kerr, Courtney Cox, and the Spielbergs. She's telling tales out of the kitchen about what those flawless celebs really eat. Food! Actual food you have to chew up and swallow. True story. I jest. No really, what she has to say will either make you love these stars because awww, they're so relatable or just envy them more.

Warning! This meal may set off your gag reflex before you even open your mouth!

World renowned Hong Kong chef Alvin Leung is getting a lot of attention for his signature "Sex on the Beach" dish and it's nothing like it sounds.

The slithery pink, edible condom laid over powdered shiitake mushrooms (made to look like sand) conjures up some feelings all right, but sexy isn't one of them.

When I heard there was a Pippa Middleton party book I got all excited. Finally, the secret to getting into debauched costumed bacchanalias with French millionaires and dwarfs revealed! OUI. But non. It is not that kind of party book. I put down my powdered wig and sequined thong with a sigh.

No, Pippa Middleton's new party book is a respectable tome called Celebrate: A Year of Festivities for Families and Friends. No mention of strippers anywhere on the cover. Instead, it's "a comprehensive guide to simple and creative entertaining." BuzzFeed says the cover looks like a Pinterest board and they're right. But what else is in the book?

Waiting sucks, indeed!! Remember way back in the spring when we told you about True Blood: Eats, Drinks, and Bites from Bon Temps? Well, guess what?! It's ALMOST HERE! The cookbook we've all been waiting for will hit the shelves on Wednesday, August 22, and if the just-released trailer is any indication? Well, we can all count on putting on a good 20 pounds of southern-fried YUM in the very near future.

Hmm. Guess all those vamps would end up looking like Hoyt's mama someday if they actually ate food!

Happy 100th birthday, Julia Child! The legendary TV chef died in 2004, but in so many ways she is very much still alive and with us. If your kitchen features a pegboard for hanging pots and spoons, a little bit of Julia lives with you. She "invented" that idea. And she was the original American celebrity chef with her television shows, especially The French Chef.

Julia Child was imposingly tall and authoritative yet goofy and utterly generous. She was hilarious. And most importantly, she gave Americans the courage to cook more adventurously. I've gathered together a collection of Julia Child videos, clips from her show and even a little snippet from the movie that immortalized her, Julia and Julia.