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How Couples Decide Who Really Belongs in the Kitchen (PHOTOS)

couple cooking In terms of household chores, there are few that are as relentless as cooking. No matter how much you ate yesterday, you still have to eat today, which means that SOMEONE has to cook.

Thankfully we've moved past the days where it is just assumed that the wife will always do the cooking.

Or have we?

It turns out that for many couples, who is in charge of cooking is something that shifts and is regularly up for negotiation, while in other couples, it is clearly one person's job. Read on to find out what is REALLY going on in other people's kitchens, as we ask couples: Who is in charge of cooking in your household?


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1Cook or Starve!

"Me, because if I want to eat, I need to cook it. Ain't no one else gonna! But that means I get to cook what I want. Husband doesn't always like what I make, but unless he wants to be hungry, he eats it." -- Tracy R., Saint Paul, Minnesota


2Vegan Chef

"I cook! I'm vegan and it's easier for me to plan and be in charge of what is okay/what isn't. Also, my significant other didn't know how to make grilled cheese when we got together and I love cooking. He is on cleanup and dish duty, which I hate." -- Mia J., Saint Paul, Minnesota


3Mama Taught Him Well

"My husband cooks. His mother is an amazing cook and she taught her kids about contributing to family meals, herbs and spices, etc. 

"My mom was a can-of-cream-of-mushroom-soup-on-everything kind of gal. I can't cook for shit unless I'm following a recipe. BUT I can bake circles around him." -- Megan M., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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4Joint Venture

"We both do! We both work from home and depending on how busy one is before dinner time, the other will usually pick up the slack and get it started. Although my husband will never just make something without asking me first. Sometimes I wish he would just surprise me without asking! But at least he is cooking. We also love to do it together whenever we can and make it a fun nightly activity for us. One of my favorite date nights with him is when we turn on some Frank Sinatra, drink wine, dance in the kitchen, and cook a nice meal together! I know, puke, we are total newlyweds with no kids!" -- Lauren C., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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5Lucky Lady

"He does 90 percent of the cooking here. Partially because he's more interested in it, partially because I work more. I am really good at 'cook a protein, a carb, and a vegetable and have them all get done at the same time,' and his version of dinner is quite a bit fancier.

"He's also a lot better at customizing food for everyone (so our kid eats dinner deconstructed a lot -- the casserole becomes noodles and meat and veggies instead, etc.). He does the dishes, though, too, I think because I am mean but also because he makes a HUGE mess and that way I don't get the right to complain about it since it doesn't affect me." -- Katie B-K, Saint Paul, Minnesota

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6Me or Pizza

"Me, because if my husband were in charge of meal planning, there would be no planning, and we would be eating pizza or Chipotle every night!" -- Melissa V., Saint Paul, Minnesota


7Grill Master

"I do the cooking, he does the grilling! I'm very picky and a control freak so it's my own fault. When I have a migraine or I'm sick, he makes dinner and the boys bring it up on a tray to bed for me. It's so cute! Usually soup / grilled cheese or pizza." -- Nicole J., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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8His Job

"My husband does daily cooking: 1. Because he is very tied to his schedule of eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner at specific times (I tend to eat more when I am hungry). 2. We like different foods. He wants to eat meat. LOTS of meat. I prefer smaller quantities of meat (if any), which is not acceptable to him. 3. I am a very good cook, and am fine with cooking but do not like to clean up. 4. He likes to grill. 5. After 24 years of marriage, last year he told me he DOESN'T like rosemary in food and I use a fair amount of rosemary. I was not amused and told him I wouldn't cook. 5. Boils down to, he does much more of the cooking, but if I want anything that is tasty for me, I cook." -- Dianne P., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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9Veggies, Please!

"Me! I work fewer hours outside of the home than my hubby does, so it makes sense in terms of division of labor. Plus, if cooking were up to my husband, meals would consist mainly of easy proteins and carbs and very few vegetables -- not how I want myself or my children to eat. Also, I really enjoy cooking and trying new recipes -- another thing my husband would never do!" -- Johanna A., Saint Paul, Minnesota


10Lessons for the Kids

"I do all of the cooking. I enjoy cooking and was taught how by my dad and grandma.

"Hubby also doesn't cook (he could though) because his mom did everything for him and his brothers growing up and as she says, 'It's women's work to be in the kitchen and taking care of the home and children.' Gag! My children will not raised like that!" -- Liz K., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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"My husband does 90 percent of the cooking -- at least. I have a few dishes we both enjoy that I'm good at, but I've ruined everything from chili to pancakes. If we want something other than turkey sandwiches or tuna salad, he's on it. I'm also very lucky!" -- Hannah M., Saint Paul, Minnesota



"What is this cooking you speak of? Does reheating takeout count? Because we can both TOTALLY do that!" -- Abbey J., Tucson, Arizona

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13Learning Curve

"Husband does about 75 percent of the cooking because he's better and faster at it. He grew up cooking and it's very intuitive for him. I grew up eating fast food and microwave dinners, so I have had a pretty steep learning curve. It takes me longer to cook and is a bit of a crapshoot if it will turn out or not! But we both enjoy it." -- Karen S., Saint Paul, Minnesota

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