Waiting tables has to be one of the hardest jobs out there. Honestly, I don't think I could handle it. So when my order gets muddled or a server seems flustered I'll usually let it slide. Sometimes, though, things get weird. Jimmy Fallon recently asked viewers to send him tweet him their "weird waiter" stories, and the results are a hoot.
Doesn't everyone have a crazy restaurant story? Like the time a friend of mine ordered a cocktail with dinner. When her drink arrived there was a fly in it -- frozen in an ice cube! When she pointed it out to the waitress she shrugged and said, "So? You wanna another drink?" Um, maybe this wasn't the first time this had happened. Yikes! Amazingly, my friend said YES. The waitress brought a new drink over. "It's on the house," she said, "on account of the fly." I asked my friends to tell me their stories, and you will not believe the wackiness -- or maybe you will.
1. I was talking with some friends at dinner, and I said "Colorado," pronouncing it with a short a. The waitress was removing some dishes and said, "It's pronounced Colo-RAH-do." And then left.
2. Many years ago we stopped at a Denny's in Rhode Island late at night as a very last option. It was my first and last visit to Denny's. I ordered eggs, which came with meat, so I told the waitress I didn't want the meat. She said it came with it and it would be the same price if I had the meat or not. I was fine with that. Then she asked if I wanted sausage or ham. Again, I told her no meat. Again she said "But it comes with it." A few more rounds of this and I finally gave up. My eggs arrived with meat.
3. When I was in college, I studied American Sign Language. A few friends of mine from sign language class were eating at a diner. One half of the table were talking to one another and my friend and I were signing to each other. The waitress came, handed the two talking friends menus, pointed to my friend and I (the signing ones) and before handing us menus, asked the other two, "Do they know how to read?"
4. Before my husband and I got engaged, a waitress randomly began quizzing us about how long we'd been together and then lectured him about how it was time to pop the question and asking him what he was waiting for, etc. Mortifying, basically.
5. I once ordered a beer of some kind and she said “That’s $10. Do you understand? Can you afford that?” To this day I think maybe she had me confused with someone else. So weird.
6. My son and I were out to lunch and the waiter started talking to him about what Santa brought. He mentioned the Star Wars movies, and no joke -- the dude looked at us and said, "What's that? I've never heard of that." I about fell over. He was probably in his mid-20s. How do you NOT know what Star Wars is???
7. I had an incredibly rude waitress once who said, "There are MANY different kinds of wine. Ordering red or white house wine tells me nothing," while rolling her eyes and huffing. Yeah, buh-bye tip.
8. A server once said to me, “pancakies for the mister!” I'd ordered a burger, and also I am a woman.
This last one isn't so much crazy as unusual -- in a great way:
9. My date was acting like a complete jerk, trying to get me to drink more than I wanted to. I continuously refused, because I had long drive home. When he went the bathroom, the waitress pours more water to say, "The staff and I agree that you should not go on another date with him, because he's a complete jerk."
What kinds of crazy things have you heard at restaurants?
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