Chocolate Is Good for You for ALL the Right Reasons (For Real!!)

chocolateGreat news for people who love chocolate. A new study shows that chocolate-eating teenagers have less abdominal fat than teenage chocolate eschewers. (Please note I said chocolate-eating teens, not teen-eating chocolates, which is another post I'll write someday.) Abdominal fat is the kind that is most often linked with health issues. The fat on our hips and ass, on the other hand, is A-OK, ladies. Anyway, the scientists don't know why this is, but they're thinking the flavonoids, especially abundant in dark chocolate, might be responsible.

Obviously this study needs to be replicated on adults. About which: Scientists? I'd like to sign up for that study. As far as I'm concerned, this is something I can help you investigate. And while we're at it, let's look at some other foods we used to consider bad for us which might actually benefit us.


Red wine. I know this is not news. You've already heard about the resveritrol and the antioxidants. But I really think more research is needed, specifically on women my age who live on the East Coast and wear a shoe size 8 1/2, and I would like to offer my services.

Whole milk. I drank skim for years before I saw my skinny friends Doug and Rebecca pouring lavish amounts of whole milk into their morning coffee. But they're anthropologists, see, and you should always take your lifestyle cues from anthropologists. Also: You need a little bit of fat to help absorb vitamins, and if you choose mostly grass-fed cow's milk, you're also getting good-for-you cholesterol.

Lard. Not just any lard, though. You want chemical-free leaf lard from a pasture-raised pig. The monounsaturated fats lower LDL levels and won't degrade into toxic gunk at high temperatures like many vegetable oils do. And it makes the flakiest pie crust. For a slightly less porky crust, I'll do half butter, half lard, all good times.

More from The Stir: 5 Ways to Tell if Your Whole Grain Bread Is for Real

Bread. I know, I hardly eat it anymore, either. But whole wheat flour has also been linked with slimmer waistlines, along with decreasing your risk of heart disease, stroke, type 2 diabetes, and colorectol cancer. Honestly, my personal theory is that all the gluten misery stems from GMOs. But more research is needed. I'd like to start with a hot, fresh slice of homemade whole-grain bread slathered with butter ...

Are there any supposedly "unhealthy" foods your friends can't believe you eat anyway?


Image via John Loo/Flickr

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