Hey, ladies, does ice cream get you in the mood? Not in the mood to stuff your pie hole, I mean in the mood for loooove? No? Well, it might after seeing Sexiest Man Alive Bradley Cooper in this new commercial for Haagen-Dazs. I don't eat dairy but watching hotness personified Bradley swirl ice cream into his perfect lips is almost enough to make me want to run out and grab a pint!

So here's the lowdown on the commercial ...

Bradley is looking all fine at a black tie fancy party and he's standing there with his own pint of Haagen-Dazs, spooning the luscious creamy treat into his mouth. Is it hot in here? Anyway, the party must have not had food or something and Bradley had to run out to the 7-Eleven to get a snack. He was hungry! Poor Bradley! What a dumb party.

So he's minding his business eating his ice cream when this brunette chick who is NOT ME begins making eyes at him. WTF? Lady, don't you know this is my future husband? Seriously, bish, get your own man.

Bradley humors her by following her into a side room, despite the fact that he clearly wants nothing to do with her because he is madly in love with me. But that's Brad for you. He doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Is it any wonder I adore this man?!

Then the bitch pushes him down on the couch and starts to paw him like she wants to rip his suit off! Hey, crazy lady! That's my man you're sexually assaulting. I'm calling the cops!! Ohh, but then she turns and leaves -- with the ice cream! She's not only a scary bish, but she's a thief!

But Bradley has the spoon! So she eats the ice cream with her finger. Gross! So unhygienic. No wonder Bradley feels sorry for this lost soul. She needs help!

All righty, sweetness, time to come home now. And bring the Haagan-Dazs, 'kay, lover? I'll spoon feed you, boo.


Image via Haagen-Dazs