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Chewing Gum & 7 Other Snacks That Have No Business Being Caffeinated (PHOTOS)

gumHey, wake up!! Good news for sleepyheads: Now you don't even have to hassle with the inconvenience of a grande latte to get your morning (or afternoon, or evening) buzz, thanks to Alert Energy Gum, Wrigley's soon-to-be-on-the-shelves new chew. Available in fruit AND mint flavors (why not mocha?), the gum is intended for consumers ages 25 and up who, I assume, are either incredibly tired or impatient or both.

Caffeinated gum isn't an entirely new concept, to be fair, but now that Wrigley's is in the game somehow the whole idea seems more legit. Or if not legit, at least more readily available. But ... really?! Do we really need caffeine in our chewing gum? Look, I'm not judging -- this is coming from someone who would probably just cease to function entirely without the aid of coffee -- but I just don't know if I can get behind the idea of caffeinated gum anymore than I can get behind the idea of any of these caffeinated snacks.

Image via AlertEnergy.com

 

Image via Hermann Kaser/Flickr

1Jelly Beans

Caffeinated jelly beans?! These sound like a psychotic episode waiting to happen.

Image via Jameson Fink/Flickr

2Potato Chips

Yes, they do exist. And NOBODY can eat just one. POTATO CHIPS!!!!!

 

Image via David O

Image via David O'Hare/Flickr

3Gummy Bears

So cute. So caffeinated. Every mother's worst nightmare.

 

Image via theimpulsivebuy/Flickr

4Jerky

I don't know anybody (besides some boys who like camping and, I don't know, pro wrestlers?) who eats jerky in general, so the idea of jerky with an extra jolt is mystifying. Although perhaps an easier way to wake up on the trails than making coffee?

Image via Bryan Ochalla/Flickr

 

5Marshmallows

Dude, I really like marshmallows. So I could easily see myself eating like, 10 of these things. And then jumping off the roof, yelling "I can fly!!!"

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