So, guy walks into a Subway ... (Yeah, it sounds like the beginning of a joke, but it's actually the beginning of a totally crazy story -- which of course took place in Florida, because where else?) Luis Martinez ordered a Philly cheesesteak -- the way he says he always has it -- with "American cheese, onions, and ketchup." But "sandwich artist" Lawrence Ordone, who was behind the counter at the Subway-within-a-Walmart, told Martinez he just couldn't do it. "I have never put -- we don't even have ketchup at Subway -- I've never put ketchup on anybody's sandwich," he told the local news station.
Well, you'd think it would have just ended right there, and Martinez would have settled for a lil' mayo perhaps? Extra onions? Nope!
He refused to buy the half-done sandwich without ketchup. Apparently, a guy behind him in line even offered to buy it (probably so he could just get on with his own order and life). Ordone claims Martinez mouthed off at that guy (which Martinez denies). But either way, "That's when I flew off the handle," Ordone admits.
Martinez says Ordone "shoved a chair to the side, like knocked it down to come at me, and I said, 'This is going to be serious.'" And Ordone admits, "I said, 'Let's go, fight me like a man!'"
Oh, and then it got WORSE! "He threatened to kill me in front of my wife," said Martinez, who then called 911, but by the time the police got there, Ordone had peaced. He was fired from his job the next day (duh), and let's hope he considers anger management classes. He doesn't sound too remorseful, though, having said about the entire showdown:
There's ketchup three aisles down. You can go buy your own ketchup, and I promise to God, you can put as much as you want on it and nobody's going to say nothing.
What ... the ... ?!
Seriously, this is insanity, right? But then again ... hmm, this isn't the first time I've heard of people being super-particular, OCD, totally stubborn about a single, solitary, seemingly silly condiment.
I'm guilty of it. I've passed on perfectly delicious Greek or Mediterranean dishes if the dining establishment doesn't have tzatziki (cucumber yogurt dip), which I find a perfect complement to grilled chicken, pita bread, and veggies. My mom will literally flip out if she sees someone eating a hot dog with ketchup. As far as she and many other born-and-bred Chicagoans are concerned, hot dogs must not be paired with anything other than yellow mustard (or chili meat sauce, green relish, onions, cool kraut). In some cases, it's regional. While we might never think of dipping French fries in anything but ketchup, Germans, Belgians, and other Europeans opt for mayo.
But, ultimately, to each their own. Let's not come to blows over it, okay, guys?
What do you make of this crazy story? What's a condiment you're particular about?