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Black Market Twinkies Can Be Yours for Just $15 Million Bucks! (Or Try This Recipe)

by Jacqueline Burt on November 19, 2012 at 6:35 PM

puppy twinkiesForget about Klondike bars -- what would you doo-oo-oo for a Twinkie? That is the question. Because since Hostess announced the iconic snack cake's impending extinction (well, unless somebody buys the company, which is a possibility), people have been in full-on hoarding mode, buying up cases of creme-filled sponge cakes like it's the Twinkie Apocalypse or something.

Look, I'm not gonna lie: I like myself some Twinkies. Still, what would I doo-oo-oo for one? Go to the store and buy a package, I guess. Maybe I would order a box online. Maybe I would even try to find them on eBay, if it came to that. But would I place a bid of $15 million?!

No, of course not -- but somebody WOULD list a box of Twinkies on eBay for $15 million, and a bunch of other somebodies would set similarly high prices for their Twinkies (so far, anywhere from 1 to 21 million bucks). That's right, discontinued Hostess products are apparently worth more on the black market than drugs, diamonds, or human organs. And those are just plain old Twinkies -- can you imagine how much the rare chocolate creme Twinkies will end up going for in a year or so? To say nothing of Zingers, those weird jelly-roll hybrid things. This one is definitely the best deal to date, though:

twinkie ad

HOSTESS TWINKIES DELIVERED TO YOU BY THIS ADORABLE YORKSHIRE TERRIER PUPPY!


TWINKIES AND PUPPIES!!!! AWWWW!

Anyway. Assuming you aren't insane wealthy enough to spend millions on a junk food craving, you COULD try making your own version of a Twinkie at home using this Top Secret recipe from Todd Wilbur:

Ingredients

For the cake:

Nonstick spray
4 egg whites
1 (16-ounce) box golden pound cake mix
2/3 cup water

For the filling:

2 teaspoons very hot water
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 cups marshmallow creme (1 [7-ounce] jar)
1/2 cup shortening
1/3 cup powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla 

Cooking Directions

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.

Fold each piece of aluminum foil in half twice. Wrap the folded foil around the spice bottle to create a mold. Leave the top of the mold open for pouring in the batter. Make 10 of these molds and arrange them on a cookie sheet or in a shallow pan. Grease the inside of each mold with a light coating of nonstick spray.

Disregard the directions on the box of cake mix. Instead, beat the egg whites until stiff. In a separate bowl combine cake mix with water, and beat until thoroughly blended (about 2 minutes). Fold egg whites into the cake batter and slowly combine until completely mixed.

Pour the batter into the molds, filling each one about 3/4 of an inch. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 minutes, or until the cake is golden brown and a toothpick stuck in the center comes out clean.

For the filling, combine the salt with the hot water in a small bowl and stir until salt is dissolved. Let this mixture cool.

Combine the marshmallow creme, shortening, powdered sugar, and vanilla in a medium bowl and mix well with an electric mixer on high speed until fluffy.

Add the salt solution to the filling mixture and combine.

When the cakes are done and cooled, use a skewer or chopstick to make three holes in the bottom of each one. Move the stick around inside of each cake to create space for the filling.

Using a cake decorator or pastry bag, inject each cake with filling through all three holes.

Makes 10.

What would you do for a Twinkie?


Image via eBay

Filed Under: baking, recipes, in the news, desserts

Comments

4
  • tuffy...
    --

    tuffymama

    November 19, 2012 at 7:01 PM
    I wouldn't do a damn thing for a Twinkie. Yuck.

    I really feel very badly for the non-union workers who got screwed over because the fucking union wouldn't take a TWO PERCENT cut to their pensions to keep Hostess going. I hope the union pricks really enjoy their welfare checks written by people like my husband who bust their asses to pay taxes. And it looks like Mexico wins again, since a Mexican company will probably buy out Hostess. SMH.
  • jkm89
    --

    jkm89

    November 19, 2012 at 10:14 PM
    Lolololol! Tuffymama, that is laughably incorrect.
  • Histo...
    --

    HistoryMamaX3

    November 19, 2012 at 10:30 PM

    It is really sad that the company went under and all those people were out of work... but jmk is right, Tuffymama is very misled in the grand scheme of things. High time we realize that the unions are NOT in our best interest and are more willing to screw over its members than the businesses they fight against, as they did in these circumstances. Unions are not as they were in the good ol' days where they were a group of workers standing up for their rights. Now they are a bunch of lobbyist using the workers as pawns in their pocket-lining schemes.

    It really is sad.


  • gerig...
    --

    gerigirl90

    November 20, 2012 at 2:50 AM
    I agree with Historymama
1-4 of 4 comments

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