In an hour or two or three, all of us will be faced with one of the most dreadful questions we have to face every day: "What's for dinner?" In our house, the answer usually involves ... you guessed it -- CHICKEN! It's easy, it's healthy, and it's tasty. But it can get so old, so fast. Thank goodness some kooky, kinky lady decided to release a brand new cookbook that attempts to make chicken sexy: Fifty Shades of Chicken: A Parody in a Cookbook by F.L. Fowler. Sounds like a total joke, right? Well, like many Fifty Shades spoofs, it is -- but it's also a real cookbook filled with "50 chicken recipes bound to be delicious!" Get it -- eh, eh?
Set for a November 13 release date (just in time for the holidays!), "Fowler" (a totally made up name) recently revealed to People magazine the general gist of her spoof and a couple of recipes. Besides offering 50 recipes, the book reportedly "follows a chef and his chicken on an emotional journey very much like the original trilogy." Oh. Wow.
You start with an overbearing cook and a pigheaded chicken but by the end they’re spanking and tying each other up like soul mates. There’s a bit of Christian and Anastasia Steele in every dish. ... One day as I was tying up the ankles of a chicken for roasting, I realized why some of the scenes in the book were so strikingly familiar. It turns out I’ve been practicing BDSM for years -- but with poultry!
Ha! Whaaaaat?! So crazy! But, also, genius! Who doesn't need spicier chicken recipes to add to their boring, "vanilla" cooking regimen? (Well, vegans and vegetarians, but you know, besides them ...)
You know ... I would totally make "Mustard-Spanked Chicken" or "Dripping Things" in a heartbeat. (Yes, those are real recipe names!) I wonder what else we have to look forward to here. "Thai"-ed Up Chicken Legs? Lip-Bitingly Yummy Breasts With a White Wine Reduction?! The appetizing -- or appetite-killing, depending how you see it -- possibilities are endless ... Sounds like the most useful Fifty Shades spoof to me so far!
Here's a funny clip from the TODAY show about the book ...
Would you check this out to spice up your dinner?
Image via Amazon.com