There are some people who deserve gold medals in being awesome, and this lady is one of them. Eileen Gannon from Des Moines, Iowa, come forward to claim your fictional prize because god dang woman, yous a genius. No, Gannon didn't have anything to do with that Mars Rover landing (that we know of), but she did see to the completion of something just as magical. Gannon created a spiced caramelized bacon coffee. A little bit pumpkiny, a little bit caramely, a little bit piggy, this amateur mixologist is obviously some sort of godsend.
Thankfully, I'm not the only one who thinks so. Gannon is one of the few finalists in Seattle's Best new coffee flavor competition, which means we might be THISCLOSE to sipping on some heaven this fall.
Based on research that says pumpkin spice turns men on, Gannon concocted her coffee drink that she calls "how to win a guy in one sip," and won the local competition at the Iowa State fair. She's now eligible for the grand prize of $10,000.
I haven't found it spelled out anywhere that the winner of the overall contest gets their flavor packaged and sold by Seattle's Best, but we gotta assume that this is part of the deal, yes? They wouldn't just tease us with sugar pumpkin bacon coffee then not let us have any, would they? That'd be downright evil.
I don't think I'm alone when I say I will storm the fucking state of Washington to get a taste of "how to win a guy in one sip" if I gosh darn have to. Consider yourself warned.
Watch Eileen and her coffee show off at the state fair:
How delicious does this flavor sound?
Photo via word ridden/Flickr