King Size Candy Bars Go the Way of the VCR

king size candy

Pour one out for the king size candy bars -- come next year, they'll be a thing of the past. Mars just announced that they're discontinuing the royally sized treats in 2013 and will only sell candy bars that have no more than 250 calories. So say goodbye to those jumbo bags of Peanut M&M's you like to buy and eat while watching Friends reruns on Saturday night. And bid adieu to the over-sized Twix bars you'd purchase thinking you'd give half away but never, ever shared with anyone. The ginormous and glutinous Mars candy options are about to become extinct.

The next generation will know nothing of the VCR, and nothing of the king size. I believe a little part of me just died.


There's just something about the king size that makes me a bit nostalgic. They provided such a thrill as a kid -- they were forbidden, they were untouchable, they were $1.25 when the regular size ones were $1. It meant you had to weigh the risk of asking your mom for a quarter and having her find out why. They were the reason you'd trek three neighborhoods over on Halloween to visit Zach's house, whose dad handed out the elusive king size Snickers. They were tradable for GOLD at the lunch table, and they were the stuff Valentine's Day dreams were made of. I once received a king size bag of Skittles. Needless to say, I let the boy hold my hand for three seconds. It only seemed fair.

So to the future children out there yet to be born, I salute their lack of diabetes and sugar highs -- I hope Mars' decision will do them good. The company explained that they want to lead the way when it comes to responsible snacking and will replace the king size bars with bags of candy that lend themselves to being shared, or saved for later ... HA HA HA. Saved for later! That's a riot.

I'm off to Costco -- gotta hoard the king size while I still can. And no, you can't have any.

Will you miss the king size bars?


Photo via like the grand canyon/Flickr

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